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Saturday, November 12, 2005

Pat Robertson, Shut Your Pie Hole!

You can always count on Pat Robertson to do one thing - open up his noise hole and make a total ass of himself in the process.

Now it takes real talent to say something stupid everytime you speak. Very few people can pull this off. The best I can do is pull off a 20% "say something stupid" rate - and that is if I make an effort.

So what did The Patster say this time? First some background information.

Very recently, as in the most recent election day, a rural Pennsylvania town gave the boot to all 8 members of a school board because the board decided to incorporate "intelligent design" theory into science classes. This pissed off the voters, so they fired the entire board and hired another.

Now for Pat Robertson's take on this action. He warned the residents that disaster may strike because they "voted God out of your city".

Here are some more comments he made.

"I'd like to say to the good citizens of Dover: If there is a disaster in your area, don't turn to God. You just rejected him from your city," Robertson said on the Christian Broadcasting Network's "700 Club."

And

"God is tolerant and loving, but we can't keep sticking our finger in his eye forever," Robertson said. "If they have future problems in Dover, I recommend they call on Charles Darwin. Maybe he can help them."

Someone ought to tell Pat that nobody voted out "God", they voted out a bunch of PEOPLE who wanted to mix theology / philosophy into science class. You do not teach spanish in english class, you do not teach history in math class, and you do not teach philosophy in science class. Duh.

And as for calling on Darwin for help, what kind of crap is that? What does it say about the God he believes in? Should we sacrifice chickens or something to keep hurricanes away? Were all the people killed on September 11, 2001 athiests? Were the people who died on the russian submarine Kursk calling out for Charles Darwin? How about when a tornado flattens a church? What does that mean? That the church had a huge Charles Darwin stained glass window?

Pat Robertson has also said some other great stuff. Like for example, calling for the assassination of Hugo Chavez - the President of Venezuela. Would this make him a terrorist? That is that we call people who get on TV and call for the assassination of ANY American president. Did God tell Robertson to call for the murder of another human being?

But that is not all folks! He also said that feminism encourages women to "kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians."

Witchcraft? Kill their children? The idea that women can be independant causes all these things? And does the man actually believe in witchcraft? I thought all that flying around on a broom and making potions from eye of newt and wing of bat went out with the 1500s. Get real man.

And lets not forget that he also called for the State Department be blown up with a nuclear device. At least according to this article in the Ft. Lauderdale Sun-Sentinal.

He also predicted that Walt Disney World in Orlando Floirda would be flattened by tornados / hurricanes (aka "God's wrath")because Disney sells admission tickets to gay people. Last time I checked, none of the hurricanes that hit FL did very much damage to Disney. In fact, I do not think that any real damage was caused.

So there you go people. If you live in Dover Penn, expect it to rain toads soon. Feminism will turn all women into witches. Nuke the State Department. After all, Pat Robertson has spoken!

Normally I do not wish smite on people, but in this case I will make an exception. I would like to see every property that Pat Robertson get flattened by various natural disasters. Not his neighbors, just his. Like a tornado that only hits one house in one city or something else that just never happens. Then lets hear what comes out of his blow hole.


5 Comments:

Blogger Juggling Mother said...

Umm, is it not illegal in America to call for the State Dept to be nuked?

Over here in the UK I think we might consider that treason, or at least sedition, maybe inciting violence?

04:52  
Blogger TLP said...

Yeah. He is just a piece of sh*t. He actually seems to think that god talks to him.

I think he may have said that AIDS was god's curse on gays. Well, in that case, I guess that lesbians are god's chosen people. They have about the lowest incidence of AIDS in the world.

10:23  
Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Pat Robertson is indeed a turd. The world would be better off without him.

19:24  
Blogger GodlessMom said...

The man is a complete lunatic. It would be truly hysterical if it weren't for the fact that he influences so many people.

11:38  
Blogger Econo-Girl said...

Insightfull rebuttal to the words of Robertson.

WWJD? Do you think that Jesus would go on national t.v. and call for someone's assassination?

I heard recently that faith is no good without understanding to go with it. That there are plenty of people with lots of faith and no understanding, and that's where things like the Inquisition come from.

16:34  

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