General Rant

OK, so I am at my favorite place in the universe, enjoying a beer or three (or maybe four - I lost count). I got to thinking, which is often a very dangerous thing for me to do.

Why did my last parking ticket cost $15??? What the fuck is up with that? It is 25 CENTS for 15 minutes. 25 CENTS!!!!!!!!!!!! How the hell can the SHITTY of South Miami justify charging me 15 bucks? Do you realize that for 15 bucks, I could buy 15 HOURS of parking? What the hell kind of communist shit is that?

I paid the ticket, but fuck South Miami. Next time I park there, I am going to spray paint the parking meter. Or maybe I will put super glue in the lock so the SHITTY can not open the meter to get the coins out. They can all kiss my big green reptilian ass. In fact, they can kiss my ass AND give me a rim job. Fucking parking gestapo, always going after the working man.

The worst part is that the parking meter was NOT WORKING!!!! I put a few quarters into it before I realized this. Was there anyplace else to park??? NO! So I left my truck there. The fucking parking meter nazi gave me a ticket anyway. I hope his mother is proud of his job.

If you are the mayor of the shitty of South Miami - YOU SUCK DONKEY BALLS! I hope you burn in hell you asshole. May the fleas of 1,000 camels infest your piss hole. I hope you get busted having gay four way sex with Elton John, Jeb Bush, and Boy George! I hope your balls fall off you fucking fairy. I hate you.

Just so you know, that $15 could have gone to something worthwhile, like stimulating the economy. But NOOOOOOOO! You bunch of nazi assholes has to steal it from me! Rot in hell you ass clowns.