Valuable Office Skills

I need to learn the ways of the Office Ninja.

This way I never have to go to the supply depot, or deal with procurement. Procurement is always such a pain in the ass. Here is a typical interaction.

Me: Hello procurement? I need another toner cartridge for my printer.

Procurement: What printer is it?

Me: It is an IBM "Dino-Lux 5000 BC"

Procurement: OK, we can have that toner to you in a week.

Me: But I need it now! Can't I just go over there and get one?

Procurement: Nope. You have to wait. You should have not waited till you totally out of toner.

Me: OK then can you send me two so that when one runs out I have another one?

Procurement: Nope. You have to run totally out of something before you can order more.

So yea, office ninja skills are useful. Need something? Just "borrow" it from someone else and keep it. It is not stealing if the office supplies never leave the office right? All I am really doing is simply moving the supplies from one area to another.

MOVIE REVIEW! The Constant Gardner. Yes, I finally watched it! In case you do not know, this is the movie that first made me seriously consider NetFlix. You see I rented it, kept it for three weeks, had to pay three weeks of late fees (the rental period was 5 days) - and still never watched it. But now I have watched it.

This is a political thriller, set in Africa. There are planes! Planes are cool. This British diplomat dude has to uncover this sinister plot. This movie keeps you on your toes. Well actually it keeps you firmly planted on your ass. You will not want to get up to miss any of it. Will the vast conspiracy be uncovered? Who was in that grassy knoll? Were the moon landings faked? I do not know, none of these conspiracies were in the movie - but the plot revolves around a conspiracy so foul, so deep, and so obvious that it is fairly believable.

If you like political thrillers and conspiracy movies, you will like The Constant Gardner. 4 Iguana Tail Whips.