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Sunday, September 16, 2007

Profile Reminder

I hope I have convinced anyone who is OCD enough to view this blog on a regular basis that Robot Chicken is possibly THE BEST TV show ever and that you should all watch it. It comes on late at night so you may need to tape it. Do people still "tape" crap anymore? They used to, I think now everyone has a DVR or Tivo service or whatever. So Tivo it. The show is only 15 minutes and there are no commercials, so it does not take long to watch. And it is funny.

Someone dropped a very interesting comment the other day. They said I should watch Plan 9 From Outer Space - which is famous for being the worst movie ever made. It is daytime, then nighttime, then daytime again - all in the same scene. There is the police car that is a Ford, then a Chevy, then a Dodge, then a Ford again - all in the same scene. There is the airplane cockpit with the flight controls that look a whole lot like pie tins painted black. You can see the strings holding up the UFOs. There are pointless voice overs. Bela Lugosi dies during the filming of this movie, so they get some guy to put on a black Bela style cape and run around with the cape covering up most of his face so you do not notice it is someone else. The announcer guy tries just a little too hard to emote. It really is the greatest of all the bad movies.

And how do I know this? I own a copy of the movie on DVD. See, there was this Playstation 2 game called "Destroy All Humans". You are this alien guy sent to Earth to...well....destroy all humans. You have to collect human DNA for some reason. and how do you do this? By using your super alien mind control powers to cause brains and brain stems to pop out of people. Then you collect them. And for fun (or if people are shooting at you) you have the alien death ray. If you just want to be a prick there is the super atomic mega anal probe of death.

The game is very loosely based on the movie. Supposedly. I say "supposedly" because the movie was about alien body snatchers who wanted to create zombies for some reason. Not collect DNA. But whatever.

Anyone who pre-ordered the game got a free copy of the movie. Of course I did not do this, but when I went to Game Stop to buy the game I mentioned that I should have pre-ordered it just to get the move. They had extra copies (few people wanted to take this gem of a movie with the game) so they gave me a copy.

The people working at the store thought that the movie was a joke. Something made for the game, just to drum up some fake hype and sell more copies. They had no idea what they even had! Morons. But I got my free copy.

Also Plan 9 From Outer Space is the only movie listed in my profile under "favorite movies". So yea, I think I have seen it already :)

My favorite book as listed in my profile is "Navigation Rules, Inland and International". Fun reading there! Did you know that if you see a green light and a white light you are looking at the starboard side of a power vessel underway at night? Well you are. And if you see ONLY a green light you are looking at the starboard side of a SAILBOAT under wind power at night. If you see only see a white light you are either looking at the stern of a vessel (you are overtaking) or you are looking at something that is at anchor. A red light over a white light means a commercial fishing boat is engaging in operations and is limited in its ability to maneuver. Three short blasts on the horn means "astern propulsion". A short blast then a long blast, followed by three short blasts, then three more short blasts then four short blasts then three long blasts followed by one short one long 2 shorts then one short blast means someone just called you an asshole using morse code. .- ... ... .... --- .-.. .

Pretty cool huh? There are more sound signals, light signals, and even day shape signals. I could list them here, but then that would be a lot of technical writing and I am far too lazy. So you just have to buy your own copy of the navigation.

Pirate Pete says "Ye scurvy bilge rats can be downloadin a PDF file of all thar rules for free".

I went by the Castle Harbor sailing school place today because I just happened to be at the marina where the school operates out of today. I got their propaganda and checked out the 20 footers that they start people out on. I am going to do this. I decided there that for some reason, I have to learn the valuable skill of sailing. It is for some reason "very important". I do not know why, it just is. So once things are just a little more stable and I save up a few bucks, I am going to go for it. And I am also going to challenge their twin engine power boat handling test.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

gramma had a little accident at the sand dunes today....fell down and broke her cockyx. huh? whats that you say? what the flip was gramma doin at the sand dunes?

Blogger Fuzz said...

Sailing saves money on fuel, I suppose. But I don't suppose thats a big problem for the yacht club set.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Chris Farley - Breaking your tail bone sucks, but not as much as "Breakin II, Electric Boogaloo"

Fuzz - It will be a long time before I have a boat worthy of a yacht club membership. I will start off learning on a 20 footer. If I buy a sailboat it will probably be a Hobie Cat of some kind. I can beach launch it. A step up from a Hobie Cat would be a small weekender, around 25 feet so so. It would have a small auxiliary engine (10 HP outboard would be enough) and I would like it to have an inboard diesel generator. That way I could have hot water and AC. It would be a great weekend get away boat.

Blogger Cheesemeister said...

The fact that the Navigation Rules book is your favorite convinces me that in a future life you will be Scotty. His favorite books are starship technical manuals.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

In a future life, I would like to be a cruise ship captain. Then I could wear a snazzy uniform all the time.

Blogger Fuzz said...

Sounds like a good plan.

Blogger TLP said...

I'll try to check out Robot Chicken, although your standards for entertainment are a bit low. Just sayin'.

Funny about Plan 9 From Outer Space: I recently did a scavenger hunt on my blog, and had to depict Terrible Theater. Naturally I did that movie.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Fuzz - all my plans are good plans. The only thing that prevents them from being implemented is money.

TLP - my standards are pretty high. Plan 9 was the telling of a story. Ed never really cared about anything other than telling a story.

Blogger AP3 said...

I actually still tape, can you believe it?

Yes, I know about the light rules... I was in the navy for four years, after all. I always thought navigation was kinda cool.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

AP3 - excellent. There are a lot of light rules. Red over white, green over white, red white red, red red, three in a tree (minesweeper), yellow flashing light underwater (submarine), and a lot more. Really cool stuff.

Navigation is important. I am going to take extra advanced coastal navigation classes and stuff. I may even end up with my 100 ton masters license at some point.

Blogger Ems said...

Speaking of sailing school, I've had these bookmarked, I found them the other day when I was looking at Immigrants Ships manifests...I thought they were cool.



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