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Monday, April 27, 2009

What Happens When Marketing People Smoke Too much Pot?

I have a message for the Toosie Pop marketing and product development.

These are raspberries. Notice what color they are. And no, the photo is not altered. They really are this color. Don't believe me? Go to the supermarket and pick up a carton of some. You will see that they are red.

This is automotive windshield washer fluid. The jug is clear, so the blue color is actually the color of the fluid inside. Again, this is not an altered photo. The stuff really is that color. Blue.

I do not know why it is blue. They could have made it any color. I assume this is so some dumb ass does not think it is really just water. Or maybe it really is just water, but the blue dye in it makes some dumb ass think it cleans the windshield better?

Who knows. The point is, raspberries are red and windshield washer fluid is blue.

And this is a Toosie Roll lollipop, raspberry flavor. On the lower right hand side of the photo.


What color is that?? It is supposed to be raspberry flavored. So why the hell is it the color of windshield washer fluid? Where did you egg heads get blue from? Why not make orange flavor purple? Then you can make grape orange.

Or zebra striped. Whatever. Go nuts! Make a flavor that glows green like plutonium! Call it "nuclear lime" or something.

Blue??? Really??

Not I know red is supposed to be cherry. Fine. You could have made cherry flavor light red, and raspberry a darker red.

But no. You went with Windex. Which is poisonous. And tastes pretty bad.

Now to you marketing people at the Tootsie Roll company - I do not know what kind of pot you all send around in the intra-office mail. Or what kind of LSD you put in the water cooler. I can only imagine it is some potent stuff.

But seriously. You picked a good flavor. Everyone likes raspberry. You even gave the raspberry flavored candy a nice deep red wrapper. Yes, I notice such things. I had to take various marketing classes. As a result, I look at EVERYTHING and for some reason feel the need to think about the marketing behind it.

God help me. I really do this. I can not stop. Life is pretty much ruined for me now.

So why did you pick the same color as glass cleaner for the product? What was the idea behind that? I can not figure out how something red became something blue. Crack? Angel dust? Meth? Acid? Brain damage? Color blindness? Far too much celebration on April 20th at 4:20 PM? WHAT?!?!?! I am stumped. Officially. I am stumped.

PS - Happy birthday to Samuel Morse. And a shout out to Google for reminding me about it.

3 Comments:

Blogger Lily Strange said...

I always wondered about the whole blue raspberry thing myself. Raspberry Sno Cones are blue too.

01:58  
Blogger Fuzz said...

Maybe you're supposed to eat them in the dark.

06:12  
Blogger Dusty said...

Damn fine rant Lazy. Valid points all..but dude..your speaking to people that make a lot of money for doing shit teenagers do all day for free.

22:23  

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