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Sunday, January 07, 2007

Points Of Clarification

I noticed a trend in some comments. They had to do with my vehicle photo. How could that happen!?!?!?

This is kind of like asking a sailor why he/she lets the tide roll in. Or why they allow slime and algae and barnacles to build up on the hull. It just happens. The tide rolls in and out, twice a day more or less. Nothing can stop it. The sailor does not "allow" the tide to do anything. And as for the crud that builds up on the hull - well every now and then you just have to remove it. It is next to impossible to prevent it 100%, the best you can do is manage it.

Such is the crap in the truck. I clean it out. I even bust out with the wet dry vac and stuff. But just like a high tide will gradually roll in, the trash does the same thing. I may bring a towel in the truck and not use it. This happens frequently when I take the boat out. I carry boat towels and a truck towel. 90% of the time the towel remains in the truck for weeks. Or I may go buy something, like that flashlight you can seethe box for. As soon as I get the item into the truck I usually ALWAYS have to open the box. when I get home the item goes in - but the box and bag and crap remain. Soda cans and glass ware tends to build up from the house. Ill be going somewhere, and before I leave Ill snag something to drink. When I get to where I am going, the drink container stays in the truck. And then the container never leaves.

Before I know it - there is a lot of crap in the vehicle. It gets to the point where I open a door and shit falls out. THEN I clean it out. And it is all nice and clean - till I buy something or get thirsty right before I leave to go someplace.

Point 2 - the Monopoly Money idea! It seems to be more popular than I had thought it would be. Maybe if I were not so darn lazy I could turn this into some National grass roots thing to screw with the RNC. If a million people requested propaganda from the RNC and sent back Monopoly Money -and it costs 39 cents each way for postage fees, that is 78 cents. Times one million people (1/3 of 1% of the population here) it would COST them $780,000. Now of course bulk mail for "non profit" political organizations do not pay the same postage rate as us peons, but you get the idea. It would be enough to piss off someone. So here are some links for you!

Order a stack of Monopoly Money HERE! Note - you can also order replacement money for any other Hasbro game, like Life. Life has $100,000 bills! Be your own lobbyist! Go to one of those $10,000 a plate fancy dinners - with 10 of your closest friends and eat with your mouth open and stuff. Fart and blame it on Ann Coulter! The possibilities are endless.

And someone had a GREAT idea! Include a few "Get Out Of Jail Free" cards! The RNC could use those cards. As I said, the Monopoly Money idea can be modified - the possibilities are indeed endless. If you can think it, you can mail it off. For example - just as there are "get out of jail free" cards there are also "go directly to jail" cards. And then there is the "ride the Reading Railroad" card. Would sending that card off imply that SOMEONE can't read? Huh? Someone in office right now possibly?

Oh yea, one more thing - the NEW Shark Valley ride photos are up on lazyiguana.org! You can go to the lazyiguana.org index page, or go directly to the new photos by CLICKING HERE!

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8 Comments:

Blogger Liew Yee Min said...

Hi there. Nice blog you have and I think this blog deserves better coverage and link exchange will lead you to it.

I would like to ask for a link exchange between this blog of yours and mine.

If you accept my request, kindly add my link to your blog, proceed to my blog and tell me about it.

Ignore this if you decided to deny my request.

01:33  
Blogger Kristen said...

I was going to comment on the state of the car, pre-cleaning, AS WELL AS the cleverness of the Monopoly money. I can comment on more than one thing at once - that's how I roll. Multi-topic comments.

But then you whined about how no one commented on the mess in the truck, and now you've gone and cleaned it, so I spent a long time staring at the alligators and marveling at how happy they look with their toothy grins.

13:24  
Blogger Senor Caiman said...

The Lazy,

Those are great pictures. If an alligator does attack you just rub his belly and he will drift off.

Excellent post.

13:36  
Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Kristen - who said the truck got cleaned out? I can open the doors and shit does not fall out. So it is not too bad.

Caiman - kind of hard to rub an alligator belly after it attacks.

13:46  
Blogger Senor Caiman said...

The Lazy,

Just curious, I do a lot of riding myself. Is there a trail through the glades? When I say trail, I mean a paved path where there is no chance of getting run over by a Hispanic in an Acura Integra?

17:24  
Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

There are many trails in Everglades National Park.

1. Shark Valley, where I went, is a 15 mile paved loop in the northwest corner of the park. The entrance to Shark Valley is right off US highway 41. It is closed to all private motor vehicles. The park operates trams, and you may also see a national parks truck or van. Other than that only bicycles and people walking is all you see. It is a good ride. Not too long, and there is an overlook at the half way point.

2. The main entrance to the park located south of Florida City has a paved road going all the way to the southern most point of the Florida mainland (not the keys). This road is open to private vehicles, so you may get run over by a Hispanic in an Accura. There are also dirt trails open to hikers, and boardwalk things over the swamp.

3. There are numerous canoe/kayak trails closed to all motorboats.

4. There are areas open to motorboat traffic.

5. If you want to slog through the swamp, you can. But it will be tough. If you want to get to places like Panther Mound (highest natural point in South Florida) the only way to get there is to slog.

21:20  
Blogger Cheesemeister said...

I don't even know where my back seat is at this point. So much for auto cleanliness!

03:03  
Blogger Badoozie said...

well, one things for sure, because of this messy car thing you are probably going to be winning a prize. who ever said you could not win a prize for having a messy car, huh? cool.....

12:19  

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