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Thursday, August 09, 2007

Fake News And Boat Trailers

So I was thinking up something to post for today. And I came with a great idea. Rip on CNN for something. It is pretty easy. Just go to CNN.COM and find something to rip on.

Now when I go there, I always scan the "popular news" section. And I find........some CRAP from Popular news? Some crap from Oprah?

See this is why the Country is going down the tubes. If this is what is popular, what kind of crap do you think the "news" will carry? Bullshit stories about bullshit. And of course it is presented as real news, or at least something important enough to make "National News". And if it does that it must be important, right?

And what is this crap? Questions to ask before you get married. Really. This is why chicks are insane. They read too much of this crap. And they place too much importance on this crap. Did it ever occur to someone that maybe each situation is different, and therefore there are no "questions you should ask". Other than of course "do you have herpes, genital warts, or anything else gross I should know about". But by the time you are talking about getting hitched, it is kind of late for those questions. You have already been exposed to whatever might be there.
Really - people in the USA seem to have a hard time figuring out what is "news" and what is "shit". If you are confused, let me give you a hint. Most of it is shit. Take the bridge collapse horrible event. Did we need to see endless footage? Did we need to see rescue workers in the water? Did we need to see video footage of the bridge falling down? Not really. The event itself is news, but the endless coverage is just too much. Do the news networks ever stop to think that maybe someone knows who owns the car they are showing on TV under water? Huh? Probably not. Assholes. All they see are the ratings numbers, and the advertising revenue.

And now my blood pressure is climbing. Probably taking away minutes of my life. But the last few minutes are the worst part anyway - so no big loss there.

Tomorrow I have to figure out how to defeat the evil 5 wire trailer connector. The 5th wire is for the reverse solenoid that disables the surge brakes on the trailer. My truck trailer wire connector only has 4 wires. No big deal, the boat trailer surge brake system is not functional. So I do not need it. But I may have to tow another boat trailer. A much larger much heavier boat. So it has surge brakes. And without rigging a 5th wire I will not be able to drive in reverse. Going in reverse will cause the trailer brakes to lock up. My truck already has secondary reverse lights. Twin 55 watt halogen secondary reverse lights. It is like a set of headlights behind my truck. They switch on when I shift to reverse. So I can simply tap the secondary reverse lights power supply, and make another wire connection that goes to the trailer. So when I shift into reverse, the factory reverse lights come on, which sends 12v to a relay I installed, which then opens up and sends power to the halogen reverse lights and at the same time sends power to the trailer brakes so they unlock.

Now if I borrow a Durango 4x4 for the mission, I will have something with a 318 cubic inch V8 engine. But it is a Dodge, so it will probably break. And there is no easy way to tap the reverse circuit. So I will have to put the truck into park, get out, disconnect the truck to trailer connection, then connect the running light circuit to the reverse thing on the trailer, and the two ground connections together. Then back up. Then before I can move forward again get out of the truck, and reconnect everything back correctly so the surge brakes work again.

What a mission.

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Anonymous krok beta Delta said...

The Lazy,

I was hoping to see a body float to the surface after the bridge collasped.

Hey I wanted to tell you that I have decreased the number of hurricanes that are going to hit FL by 2 x Beta.

Blogger Emma Sometimes said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Emma Sometimes said...

OHHH, please. Oprah? Seriously? Seriously. Oprah, Mrs. Anti-Marriage Oprah is telling people what questions to ask before marriage?

That's like asking Jeffery Dahmer what vegetables to buy and eat.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Krok - I do not pay too much attention to the hurricane forecast. If something is going to hit FL, it is going to hit.

Emma - Oprah did not make up the questions. Some other "expert" did. The swill was on her website and CNN picked it up.

Blogger Nvisiblewmn said...

Sooo, the Lindsay Wagner informerical about her obsession with her sleep number bed that runs on the news channels isn't actually news?

Blogger Cheesemeister said...

I'm going to qualify that I don't hate Oprah the person but I do hate Oprah the cult.
I say I don't hate Oprah the person because anybody who could survive being raped by their uncle, having the child of the bastard and then the child dies, and rising out of that to being one of the wealthiest and most respected people in the world is someone I have great admiration for.
But WTF does everyone hang on Oprah's every word like she's the second coming of Jesus or something?
I think half that stuff she spouts is written for her by other people.
Personally I liked her better when she was fat. I think she lost some personality when she lost weight. But I feel the same way about Rikki Lake.

Blogger Emma Sometimes said...

I think it's nuts to be such a big ordeal that you can dole out advice without having to dole out advice.

Holy crap, I'd love to do that. Then I could just blame my writers instead of too much coffee.


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