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Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Hot Stuff

Tuesday was somewhat exciting!

Sometime in the afternoon, I noticed a strange blue car across the street. It had no front bumper. That made it stand out somewhat.

But - whatever. Lots of people here drive pieces of shit. Can't really blame them, sometimes economic reality catches up with all of us. Cars can be expensive after all.

However, this car stood out. So I go to take a closer look. And what did I see? This.

This is where the engine should be. Notice how there is nothing at all there. No radiator, no engine, and no transmission. This can only mean one thing.

This is a stolen and stripped car.

So I decide to look for more stuff. Why not. I did not steal it. It is already stripped! It is not like I can take anything else of major value here. So I open the door. It was unlocked, and I used my shirt tail so as to not leave any fingerprints.

I may be dumb, but I am not stupid.

Well now, isn't this special. No interior at all. Well there was this concrete block where the drivers seat should be. This car used to have a manual transmission, as I can see where the stick used to be. No door panels either.

By the way, I could see the inside was stripped out without opening the car. But the windows were really dirty and it was impossible to get a clear photo without opening the door. So I did.

Where the back seat should have been I found a shirt. It said "University of Miami School Of Medicine". There was also a name on it.

So I assume the car was stolen from a UM medical student.

Anyhow I called the cops and the po po showed up. The first cop showed up in an unmarked truck. He took a look at the car and then said "Do not touch or look at this car". Well a little late there! I did not really touch the car as I know better. But I doubt the crime lab will bother much with this car. The police are too overloaded with other more important cases. The car thieves know this, and this is why the car was not set on fire.

But what the hell is up with the "do not look" part of the demand?!?!? I can look at whatever I want! This is America!

So out of spite I looked some more. I got a lawn chair and opened a beer and looked at the car. TAKE THAT! I am looking at the car!!!! And what exactly are you going to do about it?!??! As if I need to ask.

The second cop to show up was in a marked car. He hung out till the tow truck showed up. In the meantime I busted him drinking coffee and, of course, eating a donut.

Don't cops know about the stereotype? They must. But they do not care. Did he HAVE TO be drinking Dunkin Donuts coffee and eating a donut?!?!?! Really now?

So anyway, it seems my hood is a good place to dump off stolen cars. If I see this happen again, I will try my best to get a picture of the tow truck so I can give that evidence to the police.

Car thievery pisses me off.



Blogger Saur♥Kraut said...

WOW! You DID have an adventurous day!

I would've done what you did. We would make a helluva rebellious enclave, wouldn't we? We both have the same perspectives on the police. What is up with 'don't look'???

I just saw your countdown on George Bush and I'm depressed to see how many days are left. :P

Blogger Fuzz said...

Let's face it, coffee and donuts are good.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Saur - I looked. I was pretty much done looking till I was told not to look at it anymore. I called it in! But I did stay away, as I do not like getting clubbed.

Fuzz - this is true. But the public was watching! At least try to keep it on the down low :)

Blogger Cheesemeister said...

I was driving home once a 3 AM and I literally saw a cop taking a whiz on the wall of a low-rent apartment building.
I lived in a really good neighborhood back in the day, can you tell?
BTW, I can't comment on the post above this one--there's no comment link!


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