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Saturday, December 02, 2006

Revenge Of The Sith II - Ken Starr Returns.

Just when you thought it was safe to go into a court room. That could be the tag line for a movie with the same title as this post.

So yea, Ken Starr is back. It seems the hole he crawled into (dean of the law school at Pepperdine University in Malibu, California) was not exactly large enough to contain him. And as far as holes go, what a nice one he got! Dean on Law at a university located in Malibu????!!? Shit, sign me up to be the grand inquisitor of who abused the White House Christmas Card mail list! Way to go Starr!

Anyway, filed under the realm of "wacky news nobody really cares about" some high school kid busted out with a banner that said "Bong Hits For Jesus" while standing on a public sidewalk near the school while the Olympic Torch was being carried by. The school suspended him for 10 days, claiming that the event was "school sponsored". Wow. And here I thought the Olympics was some kind of international brew-ha-ha. All this time it was just an event sponsored by a high school in Alaska.

Whats that? You do not know what a bong is? Well, now you do! They look something like this and are used to smoke pot. The great thing about the bong is that the smoke is filtered through water (or snow or crushed ice or ice water or whatever). This cools the smoke down and enables the bong smoker to take in massive huge hits. You get more stoned than a woman in Afghanistan who does not wear the burqa. Maybe. Some research indicates that the water can filter out some of the THC (active ingredient) - and this research was done by NORMAL (National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws) so they would know. NORMAL can do all sorts of research on weed, but when they have pro-pot rallies everyone forgets to show up. THAT is how much they care about research! Those guys are researching 24 hours a day. This is also the reason why pot will likely remain illegal for a long time to come.

Anyway, you can see where this is going. Free speech and so on. A federal appeals court in California ruled that the sign was free speech. It should be noted that this same court has ruled in favor of schools on several occasions - but for this incident they ruled based on a Supreme Court decision allowing students to wear anti-Vietnam War armbands. Also the panel of judges ruled that the school did not show how this disrupted school activities, as the sign was stashed (so to speak) after the torch went by.

The Supreme Court agreed to hear the case. Ken Starr is going to represent the school for free. What a mentsh that Ken Starr is! Of course we all know what will happen here. As the case progresses, it will switch from the banner in question to if the student lied when he said "the dog ate my homework". This could go on for years!

In other news that nobody cares about, the NBA player's association filed a lawsuit against the NBA over a rules change and a basketball material change. The NBA players have a union? Yea, I can see how they are exploited by management! They are only making millions a year for playing a stupid game. HOW UNFAIR! And now the NBA wants to change from leather balls to micro-fiber balls?!! NO FAIR!!! And the rule change resulting in more technical fouls (and fines for the players who are called)? Pure exploitation.

I say the players show the NBA who is boss by all quitting and getting real jobs. You know, jobs like everyone else has. Jobs that pay well under $100k a year. That will show them! What a bunch of overgrown BABIES these professional sportsholes are. I PRAY that for just ONE YEAR nobody watches any professional sport on TV or in a stadium / arena - or listens to a sports cast on the radio. That would really shake things up.


Blogger Tan Lucy Pez said...

You do great rants! You really should start reading Bela's Slap of the Day. Bela's Slap of the Day.

In fact you should ask her if you can do a slap. (After you read some of her stuff and see what kinda thing she does.)

Blogger Tan Lucy Pez said...

BTW, I think that organization is NORML. No "a."

And I will be happy not to watch professional sports on TV.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

You are right. There is no "A" in NORML. They must have forgot to add the "A" on account of all the "research" and all.

You know those guys! Always working on that research!


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