Out Of Beer

Yes it is true. I am out of beer.

Of course "out of beer" means something different to me than it may to you. I have a few bottles of Bud Lite left over from a boat fishing mission. Someone brought the stuff along and forgot to drink it all. So it came home with me in the cooler. And I still have it.

But I do not really consider that stuff "beer". It is to beer what Sweet-N-Low is to real sugar. It is to beer what "low fat sour cream" is to REAL sour cream.

In other words, not the same. Not even close. But you can learn to live with it IF you have to. And why do I have to? Well it seems I am too lazy to get more beer. Plus I have been going out drinking every Friday, imbibing in pints of Sam Adams.

The way I look at it, I am consuming close to a weeks ration of beer that one day. So there is no reason to keep more at home. If I did keep the good stuff at home, then it is likely I would drink more than the recommended weekly allotment of beer, which I think is 5 or 6 servings. Something like that. I remember it averages out to less than one per day. It is less for chicks.

I think that whoever came up with this suggestion is sexist. But who am I to question such things.

My brain works like that. If I can consume X amount of something per week, then if I go at it madman style one day I can fast for other days - so it all works out. Somehow.

Problem is that the same study that came out with the recommendation also mentioned that more than 2 on any one day was not so good for you health wise. OH WELL! What the hell do they know anyway? Plenty of old men in Ireland would piss all over that study.

But there is other stuff I am looking for. This stuff. Pusser's Rum. Supposedly, it is the same rum issued by the British Royal Navy up until 1970. For 300 years, rum was consumed around the world on every British Royal Navy ship. Twice a day men would gather around what became to be known as the grog tub, where the ships purser would distribute the good shit to the men.

The rum had to be mixed down. Diluted with water. This is because back in the days when wooden sailing ships ruled the seas rum was VERY strong. Ships had limited space, so you had to make every bit of space count. Therefore, the overproof stuff was loaded in ships.

But there were rules to how the stuff was mixed down. First the purser would pour a very little amount of rum into a container. Then he would add a sprinkle of gun powder. Next he would take a magnifying glass and focus sunlight at the rum. If the gunpowder ignited, then the rum was "proved". If it would not ignite then it was because there was too much water in the rum. Similar methods were used in the wild west to prove frontier whiskey.

Anyhow after proving the rum, it was poured from one barrel into another larger barrel for mixing. The ratio was one part rum to two parts water. The mixing barrel had the words "The Queen God Bless Her" on it. Each man would approach the barrel with their rum container. The purser would say "The Queen" and the sailor would say "God Bless Her".

Before 1740 rum was rationed to men neat - without water. They would get 1/2 pint. More than enough to get tossed. After the order came down in 1740 to water the rum down, men got a full pint per day. So in effect, they got the same amount of rum.

By 1970 the tradition was reduced to a mere 1/8 pint,2 cups, per day.

Anyway, supposedly after Black Tot Day, or the day the Royal Navy stopped the tradition of daily rum (called tot by sailors) allowances, the Pusser's Rum company licensed the formula from the navy. This rum is blended, and the formula is supposed to be authentic to what was actually issued.

So I want to find some. Why not. Then I can hang out with sailboat people this Friday and revive a very old naval tradition.

The Queen. God bless her. Or whatever.