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Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Waiting For Godot

I feel like I am in a Samuel Beckett play. You know, the one about the guy in an empty room or something waiting for Godot? And the dude never shows up? Well, I feel like empty room dude.

But I am only waiting on a detailed report about how there are no illegal drugs in my pee. I did not get called today, so I guess that means the results are not in yet. I did not want to call and bug the nice HR lady. I will call the nice HR lady today if I do not hear anything. They said it could take up to 10 days, but I did not get the full battery of tests done. I know there is nothing but pee in my pee, so I am not worried or anything - I just want to end this waiting stuff and start.

So what did I do today? I created another top 10 list.

Top 10 things to do while waiting for your pee test results:

10. Watch the truck show on Spike TV
9. Email The Game Show Network and demand they bring The Gong Show back to TV. 5 times.
8. Nick Toons shows Ren And Stimpy at 11:30 PM weekdays (and at 11:30 AM too I think)
7. Watch "Wild Police Videos" on Spike TV.
6. Create Top 10 Lists.
5. Wash all the black spots off your vehicle (the tree I park under creates the spots - I had not washed them off for far too long. The roof was caked in spots and grime).
4. Sleep late.
3. Laugh at all the people going to work (I will be one of them soon, but for now I can laugh)
2. Shop for stuff I can buy soon. I want a watch that tells me what the tide is, what the moon phase is, and has a barometer, thermometer, and digital compass built in. I "need" it for my boat. It is nice to know if the tide is high, low, or going in or out.
1. Poker Stars dot Net! Give it a shot. Play for free!

Another thing I have noticed. Remember the Superfriends cartoon from the late 70s? How lame was Aquaman? And his sidekick is named "Tadpole". What is up with that. Seems a know....fruity. Apache Chief is a better superhero than Aquaman - and all Apache Chief can do is grow really large. E-NUK-CHUCK! Boomerang Network is great. They show all the old toons, going all the way back to 1930s Popeye toons. Now if they would just show Speed Racer....

My beer tour of the UK is looking fairly good. I went to the beer store and picked out a few selections. Some of the stuff I have had before, some is new to me. I even found a novelty beer. But I have a sinking feeling. It is a little known fact that beer exported to the USA is often not the same stuff made for domestic consumption. For example, right now I am trying some stuff from Morland England. The beer label says the ale is "well hopped", will just have to wait for the full review.

Anyway, I will do some research into this. It could be that the stuff I opened tonight is just not as good as the stuff still in the fridge.

So far, all I have is an assortment of ale. Nut Brown Ale, Pale Ale, and IPA. I am still hunting for a Stout and a Porter. If I can track down some Bitter, I will get that too. I found some beer from Scotland as well!

I will also have to re-visit America, the beer store has a whole lot of American micro-brews in stock. I am going to see if they will sell me an assortment of single beers - that I select.


Blogger Tan Lucy Pez said...

You do have to wonder why it takes so long to analyze urine.

Hope the results are in SOON. But look at how much fun you are having while unemployed. All that's missing is income.

Blogger BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

Well, whenever the government becomes involved, something that should take moments to uncover or explain takes much longer.

Why should a urine test be any different.

Blogger Jeff said...

You and I are in the same boat, For the last four years my job has been free of the hassle of piss tests and I was recently told that they will be coming soon. It's the end of a glorious, daily four year habit that I am dearly going to miss. That is at least until I figure out how it's going to work. I don't know about you, but I find myself exceptionally bored when I can't get stoned. Until later...

Blogger actonbell said...

Good luck in getting the custom beer assortment:) That would be groovy.

Blogger DazzlinDino said...

Call me when you do the "Worms of Mexico" tour ok?......

Blogger Saur♥Kraut said...

Ahhh, it's a lizard's life. I am truly jealous.

Blogger AP3 said...

Yeah, good luck hearing soon. And yes, Aquaman was one of the most lame superheroes of all time. Now Prince Namor the Submariner, I like.

Blogger GodlessMom said...

I'm wearing a Poker Stars shirt right now as I type this!

Anonymous The Alien Guy said...

You should try some of the beer from my planet, Shiznit. Life there is like living in one of those cartoons.


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