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Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Très Passionnant

Well Tuesday was boring as all hell. I was able to make it by Bass Pro to get some fenders, but that was it. I sort of needed the fenders anyway. So now I have em. They look like the fender pictured here. I have two of them. I have both them on one piece of line, which can run the entire length of the boat. I would like to get two more. The two fenders I already had can now be used as walking fenders. Something like that anyway.

Really the boat was lacking fenders. I would still like to get two more. Then I will have 4 good fenders, and two older smaller fenders I can use as walking fenders. Then I will be good. 19 feet of boat and 6 fenders means one fender for every 3.16 feet of boat - if I only need to fender off one side. If I have to fender off the port and starboard side, there is 38 feet of boat - but even then this is one fender for every 6 1/3 feet.

See now that is exciting! Well not really. But it was the most excitement I got all day. BORING! boring days just drag on and on and on and on and never seem like they are going to end. It is like everything is running at half speed - except you. One hour seems like two or three. You just look at the clock, thinking to yourself "tick faster you piece of shit!!". But it never ticks any faster. It just keeps going on at super slow speed.

But today will be different. Not really. I get to drive to Ft Lauderdale to go to some meeting. The meeting is mandatory and therefore can not be weaseled out of. Even the best weasel could not weasel out of it. I dislike driving to Broward County, unless chicks are somehow involved. See I am a Dade County person. Dade County people do not venture into Broward County, and Broward County people do not venture into Dade. I do not know how the roads in Broward work. If you say "take Andrews Ave to whatever street" that does not help me at all. Where is Andrews? And does it run north/south or east/west? Where is it in relation to other roads? If the road runs north/south then where do I find it - does it run through central Broward, east Broward, west Broward? Beats the shit out of me. I have no idea. It is a mystery.

So I avoid the place. Contrast this to Dade, where if you say "NW 79 ST" I know exactly where that is. No problem.

The meeting that can not be weaseled out of is for the Winterfest Boat Parade. It seems I get to be a control boat for this thing this year. I have no idea what that will involve. But it should be fun. I get to watch an ass load of large expensive (a million bucks is chump change to drop on a real yacht) boats all decorated with Christmas lights and shit float down the ICW. My job is to.....uhhhhh.....I do not know what my job is yet. This is why I have to go to the meeting. They will tell me what I have to do at the meeting.

The fun part is that I have NEVER taken my boat into Broward County waters. Never. But it will be easy to navigate, the ICW in Broward is pretty much a man made canal. Deep and somewhat wide and no obstructions or shallow spots and stuff. No problem.

As this is my first year - it will likely be something easy. Easy is good. Easy means less work. Easy means more time to watch the parade and less things to do. Less things to do means less time with the engine running which also means less gas consumed. Ill pack a camera so I can take some photos of stuff I see. If I can find my digital camera. I put it somewhere - and now I can not find the stupid thing. This sucks. So I may have to borrow one.

This is why I needed to get the fenders today. If I am going to be in congested waters with boats a whole lot more expensive than mine - I want lots and lots of fenders. I do not want to deal with some jackass who thinks I scratched their boat gel coat finish. I do not need that drama.

But at least I will finally see the boat parade. It is somewhat famous. You may even be able to watch it on the TV. It is broadcast world wide. Why - I have no idea. Really it is just a bunch of boats with Christmas lights floating down a saltwater canal. I have never gone out to see the thing, nor have I ever watched it on TV. I will see it this year however.

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Blogger Emma Sometimes said...

We have a Christmas ships parade too. I'm sure half of them are sponsored by the electric company.

I slept 13 hours yesterday after pulling a migraine. Isn't that nice?

Blogger Lily Strange said...

Well, at least you got that picture of the cool Christmas boat. I've been doing all kinds of promotional stuff, or my night at work would have been dead boring. I don't mind because I always have plenty of stuff to do for myself.
Laid back is good. Boring isn't. That's when idle hands start doing the devil's work such as, for instance, blogging!

Blogger Scarlet W. Blue said...

Christmas lights--they're everywhere. Pretty soon peops will decorate their SUV's with them and run them off of small generators in the back. I think I'll just go with a wreath on the grill of my Neon.

Blogger Avery Gray said...

Wow! Who knew boat fenders could make for such a riveting post?

Know what's not half as riveting? The contest I'm having on my blog. But you should come by anyway. Fabulous prizes at stake!

Blogger Fuzz said...

We only got 4 fenders, but they're on a Honda. (I know that was bad, but I couldn't help it)

Blogger TLP said...

Love the picture! I definitely think that I would enjoy a parade like that.

On the post below, we went to a Dada exhibit in D.C. last year. WILD is the only word to describe it. A few minutes of that stuff is okay. More than that is BORING.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Emma - the whole thing seems a bit silly. I do not even want to think about the money this is all costing.

Lily - something has to give soon. I can not keep this shit up. Going sideways is not any good.

Scarlet - I thought about putting lights on my truck, powering them with an inverter. The cops would probably harass me however. The po-po do not like it when you have better lights than they have.

Avery - boat fenders are useful, but not very exciting. I entered the contest. 4 has to be bullshit.

Fuzz - Fenders on my truck do not count. They get damaged if I use them to fend anything off. The boat fenders are much more useful.

TLP - I may go to the Dada thing Saturday. The parade is the 15th.


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