We're Number 1!
Miami is number 1 at something. Out of all the cities in the USA, we beat em all! The Mayor of Miami-Dade was going to have a parade this weekend.
It seems that Miami-Dade County is number 1 for ROAD RAGE! The parade plans were scrapped out of fear that the road closures would piss people off. Of course this would help us keep our number 1 status!
The city that is the biggest loser is Minneapolis. LOOOOOOO-SERRRRRRRRR! Minneapolis will never catch up to Miami! No friggin way! I intend to drive even worse now, so that we can remain number 1. Miami even beat out LA and New York City! We have come a long way.
Now here is the funny part.
According to the survey, some of the common road rage triggers in Miami include speeding, tailgating, cutting into traffic and having parking places stolen. Drivers in Miami are often angered by tailgating, with 63 percent of drivers saying they see the behavior daily. The survey found that half of the drivers in Miami will have the experience of having a parking place stolen from them. One-fourth of all drivers surveyed said that they see drivers run red lights every day.
What is this whining crap? Well this is to the 63% of drivers who see tailgating daily. YOU ARE PROBABLY THE ONE TAILGATING! Seriously. Bank robbers see a lot of bank robberies! People who grow marijuana see a lot of marijuana plants! And so on. So if you see bad driving every day ask yourself this - who is the bad driver? Are you seeing it because YOU are the one doing it?
Most likely. People here seem to think that everyone else in an asshole, but they are a friggin Saint. They are not the bad driver, everyone else is. When they run a red light, there is a good reason! It was yellow! They could not stop in time! They are running late!
But when someone else run a light, they are an asshole.
The same holds true for all other road range inducers. I can tailgate - but you better not tailgate me! I can not use turn signals, but if you do not use them I get pissed. I can cut you off, but anyone who cuts me off will get shot.
This is the Miami mentality. You are always perfect, everyone else sucks. So as a result, Miami is number 1 in the nation for road rage.
My contribution to this is simple really. I try to abide by all the rules. Since everyone expects me to violate the rules, I create road rage by not doing so. The driver behind me expects me to run a red light - and I do not do it. I stop. So he has to slam on his brakes to prevent a collision. And so does the person behind them. This causes road rage. I take off slowly from a stop. Why waste the gas? I am just going to get stuck at the next light anyway! This causes road rage. When I tow the boat I cause all manners of road rage. HOW DARE I drive below the posted speed limit! I should be at least 10 mph over the posted speed limit. It does not matter I am pulling over a ton of extra weight.
So this is how I am an asshole, and how I contribute to the number 1 status. I simply do not care. If someone behind me is upset, I fix this by turning up music volume till I can not hear the horns. I paid to have all the speakers in the truck upgraded, and I had an amp installed as well.
Labels: bad drivers, crazy people, Miami, road rage
posted by The Lazy Iguana @ 02:52
11 Comments:
Good point! People who rob banks see a lot of bank robberies! I love it!
You get a bazillion points for this post.
So far, I have never gotten road rage in my stroller.
I actually experience some road rage the other day. I was driving down a deserted four lane highway. PLENTY of room. I was in the lane just left of the slow lane. There were TWO lanes to the left of me and one to the right. No cars. This asshole comes up behind me and just rides my ass, like he wants me to move so he doesn't have to change lanes to get around me. I brake check him. Didn't back off. I slowed down. So he finally buzzed around me, and as he passed, I flipped him off. The feeling of rage inside me as I did that small gesture was so hot and huge, that I determined not to do that again. It was not a good feeling. I really believe that is the first time I've flipped off a driver.
Do you think it' the age demographic that makes this also an issue? I wonder.
I think every area has it's flavor. Here in the NW they don't tailgate (too much rain), but yield means if you're there, you have right of way. (just smash in!). Also the slow lane is EVERY lane. oh boy.
In Idaho, it's turn and burn.
In Colorado, it was "Please pace in my blind spot" I hated that to the point I would drive just on the line, then they would speed up or slow down. Pacing drivers. ARG.
In DC it's "Turn signal? What turn signal?"
In LA, it's merge off your bumper.
See? Flavor.
The Lazy,
Obviously Emma has road rage.
I think Miami would win all the nasty awards. The combination of the most violent Cubans and Haitians combined with the 3rd most violent blacks, it's hard for other cities to beat those cridentials.
haha turn signal.. cant use those here.. you should know that. as soon as you turn on the turn signal it tells other drivers to speed up and not let you in. on days i feel proper i turn on the blinker as i'm changing lanes so as to remain quasi legal while not giving the jerks a chance to block me out.
in the shity of miami area they have starting enforcing the "dont block the intersection" rule but only in select intersections. traffic still blows.
Hey, I resemble that.
Using a turn signal on a highway in Miami means you want the driver behind you to change lanes and speed up so you are stuck in the lane.
Cathouse - My first car would let me turn on the reverse lights without taking the car out of gear. It was a stick shift thing. That was always a lot of fun. I want to put a switch on my brake lights so I can turn them on without slowing down.
Daisy - That is good. But what is a deer walks up?
Emma - I do not think it is an age thing here. I think it is a third world thing. If you think you are the most important person on the planet, and everyone else should be happy to kiss your ass, Miami is for you.
Caiman - It is fun to learn to drive in Miami and then leave town. I can cause accidents all over the nation with my driving skills.
Anonymous - I like to drive down the Palmetto with my turn signal on for at least 20 minutes, then violently lurch over across three lanes.
KO4E - that is a funny name. Why is your profile blocked?
I tend to agree with you, the biggest hypocrites are the ones who do all those things and complain up a storm about other people doing it to them. I'll freely admit I tailgate at times. I admit to running red lights, but it's because I don't want to waste my brakes. They are expensive to replace. I also admit to getting really angry but doing nothing about it. Good for you for just doing your own thing and not worrying about it. That's how you bounce!
I just take out my road rage by cussing, and only I and my passengers hear it. I never do the aggressive stuff like pulling in front of somebody and then slowing way down or tailgating or even flipping the assholes off.
I love how sometimes I'll be driving to see my parents on an old highway that narrows to one lane in parts. I'll be going about 10 miles an hour over the speed limit and STILL have some idiot right on my ass. Then when the road widens to two lanes I veer right and they blaze by me like I was going five miles an hour in a 55 mile an hour zone, giving me a dirty look on the way by. Idiots.
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