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Friday, October 17, 2008

Not Communist. Maybe.

Well there is some exciting stuff going on here.

Actually, I am going to take that back. There is not any exciting stuff going on here. Just an out of town visitor. Who is bringing her adopted kid. And then everyone is going to Disney World.

Now I am not going to get into the whole adopted kid thing. I do not think it is very important. But lets just say it seems a bit strange. The kid was supposed to be adopted from China. But her hair is not straight. Ever see a Chinese without straight hair??

Me either.

And this person is not exactly sitting on cash. Adopting from China is not cheap. See China is really a capitalist nation with a one party law. Capitalist?? But how can I say that?? They are commies!!! I do not know what I am talking about.

Or do I????

The idea of "communism" is "for the common good" - right? You know, health care for the masses, social security for old people, and all that other stuff.

That DOES NOT EXIST in China. If you can not pay for something over there, you are fucked. On the other hand, if you CAN pay for something ANYTHING and EVERYTHING is for sale. Need a liver? No problem! They will find one for you. And if the "donor" has less money than you do - that liver is suddenly for sale!

Capitalism to the extreme if you ask me.

So how does someone who can not make a large "donation" to some orphanage get a kid? Who knows. The child does have a medical condition - something that could be corrected here in the USA but in the "communist" China it was left totally untreated. Because fixing it would require money.

Good thing we do not want to be "communist" huh? If we were, well then apparently the party that accused everyone else of being "communist" would rule. Nothing for you - unless you can afford to pay for it. That is the new communism. Ask China.

Anyhow be that what it may. My parents are going to foot the bill for a Disney trip for her and her kid. Cause they are cool like that.

But I am off the hook. I am not going. I weaseled my way out of it. Plus I do not exactly have the cash to go. I would need my own room - as it would be very weird to share a room with my mom, the adopted kid, and her mother which is also my cousin. This ain't Alabama!

No offense Alabama.

And then I would need park tickets. And food. And I would also want to do non kid stuff, namely go to the Food and Wine festival at Epcot Center and then attempt to drink around the world.

So anyway it would be VERY weird, I can not really afford it, and my dad is not THAT communist. Paying for a kid to go to Disney is one thing - paying for my ass to go, someone who is not a kid and who has been there a bazillion times, is quite another thing. I can either pay for my own ass to go - or I do not go.

But I am going to take the guests out in the boat. I like using the boat. It is full of gas. The oil tank has about 2 gallons in it, so that thing is almost full as well. It is all ready to go. All I need is a child size life jacket. In case I sink.

And once I do that, my work is done. If the guests even want to do that.


Blogger Cheesemeister said...

I agree that some things seem a little funny, but I'm glad your parents are being so kind as to pay for this kid to go to Disneyland. That will be nice for them.
I had this very odd dream the other night that I went to adopt a cat (like I need more of those) and there was a little girl there, probably about a year old, and the people said I could adopt her for $800. Had this been the real world I would have called the authorities about such a thing, but being as it was a dream I wrote a check for $800. Sheer unreality all around--I do not have the means to support another kid at this time in my life, nor would I want to raise a kid from infancy starting at my current age. Dreams are weird!

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

I would rather adopt another cat than a kid!!!

Cats are cheaper. I can take off for a few days, leave the cats here with extra food and water, and when I get home I am not on the TV for being some sort of child abandoning bad person.

Blogger Fuzz said...

I have seen (idealistic) communism referred to as a christian heresy. It made sense to me.
China strikes me as more fascist than communist these days.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Fuzz - Christian Heresy? How so? I would actually love to see a post explaining that one.

China is not exactly fascist. The accepted basic principles of fascism are nationalism, corporatism, third position, militarism, and totalitarianism.

Third position is opposed to communism and capitalism.

China is more like what happens when a totalitarian corporatist government falls in love with global capitalism.

Not really "free", not exactly "communist" (as practiced by the Soviet Union), and not even close to the western nations.

Blogger The Doozie said...

Ummmmm...most liver donors are going to have less money than you because they are pretty much DEAD???????

Blogger TLP said...

Maybe the kid has a "mixed" background. The Chinese don't like that. So maybe the kid was sort of "on sale."

Nice to see that we have only 93 days left of W.

Blogger Fuzz said...

What is this "third position" stuff?
I'll try to get back to you on that other stuff.

Blogger M@ said...


Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Doozie - in China, I do not think the concept of "donation" is the same as here.

TLP - that is possible. So is gene mutation. Lots of things are possible actually.

Fuzz - "third position" is not capitalism, but not communism. Fascists actually HATE communism.

m@ - I do not see any afro in the child. So I do not think so. Maybe some Mongolian? Tibetan? Who knows.

Blogger The Doozie said...

Yeah, don't ever put that "D" on your drivers license. They have that in a national alert data base, and when ever you may have even a slight brush with death they are waiting in the shadows with their igloo coolers.....and you know the rest

Blogger Fuzz said...

Here's something regarding Communism as Cristian Heresy.


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