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Tuesday, April 03, 2007

11 Days, Proof Of My Laziness, Movie Reviews

Only 11 days left till Baynanza 2007! What is Baynanza 2007? Well it is kind of like a massive free concert - only with no bands and instead of music you get to pick up trash. So it is not like a free concert at all. Well except for the free part.

This event is run by Miami-Dade County. Thousands show up - according to the propaganda that the County distributes about this event. It is huge. This is good because Biscayne Bay accumulates a lot of trash over the year. More people need to be shot for willful disregard of littering laws. This would probably help the situation.

Anyway, I registered to do something for the event. Did I mention it is free? And I have that day off.

Of course it is not free for me. I registered myself and the boat. And the boat requires.......GAS! Yes gas. Not a lot of gas - but more than a pint. More than a few gallons. And the truck that has to pull the boat will require gas. I doubt that this "gas" stuff will be free for the day.

And the boat ramp fee BETTER BE WAIVED or else I will complain to the boat ramp people. The boat ramp is run by Parks And Recreation Department, Baynanza is the idea of the Department of Environmental Resource Management. One would think that someone from DERM is going to email the boat ramp manager for Parks and Rec and ask them to waive boat ramp fees for those who are involved in Baynanza - but this would require someone to type an email, send it, someone else has to read it, write a memo, distribute the memo to all the ramps, have all the ramp attendants read it, and so on.

This is asking A LOT. Government works - but very slowly. The email asking to waive the ramp fees will be sent, but most likely it will be a week after the event. In civil service you have to pace yourself. Do too much too quickly and the boss will expect that level of work from you all the time. Slip just a little and it looks like you are slacking. But if you set low benchmarks, it is easy to make it look like you are working "extra hard" when it is crunch time. At least that is what it seems like.

You see, 11 days from the event and I have not heard anything from DERM. Well I did get one email about my registration being processed. I am going to be based in and around the Pelican Harbor Marina - wherever the hell that place is.

But that is it! I have no idea about anything else. What time should I show up? Is there to be a volunteer captain's meeting? Who am I going to be transporting? Will any children be on the boat? Will they have their own life jacket because all I have are jackets for adults. Am I to be a water taxi in constant operation, or do I get a scurvy crew of bilge rats for the day? This is critical information here!

And you would think that with only 11 days to go, someone would have sent something out to let volunteers know what the deal is.

In other news - HOLY SHIT! I have to stop being so damn lazy and DO MY TAXES! Yes, I am so lazy that I have not done my taxes yet even if the IRS owes me money. I should just do it right now. Get up right now, go to the other computer, fill out and print the PDF form, cram the W2 forms and 1040 form and whatever else I need into an envelope, and mail the shit off. Yea. I should do that. Maybe tomorrow. It is late now.

MOVIE REVIEWS! I watched Mean Creek and Midnight Cowboy. MORE DARK FILMS! I think I may need medication.

Mean Creek is about a bully. The bully beats up a kid. DUH! This is what bullies do. Anyway the kid and his older brother and some of his friends hatch a plan to get even. But then some stuff happens. And more stuff happens. And then the film ends. It is a sad film really. It was OK. Worth the time spent watching it.

Midnight Cowboy was rated X when it was released in 1969. Today it earns a measly R rating. A small town cowboy moves to New York City to become a gigolo. Being just another hick in a big city - he is less than successful. He meets up with another pitiful character who convinces the small town boy that he needs a "manager" (pimp). As a team they are less than successful. So they pack up to go to Miami. The film ends on the bus just as it arrives in Miami. It is a film of broken dreams. Sad really. But a good film. It was up for some sort of Academy Award even with its X rating back then.

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Blogger actonbell said...

Good reviews.
Good luck with Baynanza--maybe the people running it are lazy, too, and will get you all your info at the very last minute. That is aggravating. And good luck with the taxes. It really shouldn't be so hard--there's got to be a better way...

Blogger Meow said...

Good luck with Baynanza ... hope you get some more information soon.
Love your movie reviews. Have you seen any Aussie movies ??? The Castle is quite funny. Wolf Creek is incredibly gorey !!
Have a great week.
Take care, Meow

Blogger Daisy said...

Yep, we saw both of those movies too. I like reading your reviews.

Hmmm, the tax thing might be proof of your laziness, but volunteering for the Baynanza says otherwise...

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

UPDATE! Got the taxes done and mailed them off. I get back a little more than $800.

Actionbell - I am supposed to get a cool t-shirt that is exclusive to boat captains. It is supposed to be of a different design than the shirts regular people get.

Meow - I have seen Auzzie movies! The original "Mad Max" movie was shot there. Actually I think the Mel Gibson "Road Warrior" films were all shot there. But the original one that "Mad Max" was a remake of was all Auzzie. And the story line was a little different.

Daisy - Baynanza is just something I want to do. I get to be out on the water which is never a bad thing. And I did manage to send the taxes off.

Anonymous Lammy said...

Midnight Cowboy won 3 Oscars, Best Picture, Director and Writing. That was so cool having sex while playing Scrabble, or did they cut that part out of your version.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

No. The sex scrabble part was in there.

Netflix does not have movies cut. That is a Blockbuster thing. Blockbuster sucks. But then again the EVIL WAYNE used to own that company so of course it sucks.

Blogger Cheesemeister said...

What's hilarious is that even though Midnight Cowboy was rated X when it first came out, piano teachers everywhere thought that the soundtrack was really great to have students learn for recitals. So here are all these children (I was 9 or 10 at the time, I think) playing the theme song for an X rated movie!

Blogger Senor Caiman said...

The Lazy,

That DERM will always dissappoint. I don't know that I'd like strangers on my boat. I hope you will be packed just in case you run into a bunch of Haitians coming ashore. I can't believe they charge you for the boat ramp, is the boat ramp really big?

Blogger Tan Lucy Pez said...

LOVE, love, love the reviews: "But then some stuff happens. And more stuff happens. And then the film ends." Perfect.

I saw, and liked, Midnight Cowboy back in the day. Enjoyed it a lot. You know, of course, that Jon Voight (Joe Buck) is Angelina Jolie's father.

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

CM - I did not notice the sound track very much. As for the X thing, back in the day X was not porno. But still, the humor of X rated movie music used at a piano recital is pretty funny.

Caiman - the boat has decided it wants to have a stuck carb float. At idle it spits out gas. So that needs to be fixed. I already tried spray carb cleaner.

TLP - Mean Creek is a good movie. But I do not wish to give it away too much. Many people have probably not seen this one yet, unlike movies from 1969. So some stuff happens. Then more stuff. Then a few plot complications and maybe a twist or two - and then it ends. It is good.

Blogger Senor Caiman said...

The Lazy,

That's the problem with trailoring a boat, you never get out enough and the thing gums up. Do you have High & Dry's down there?

Anonymous Anonymous said...

so, why don't you file electronically? this is really the way to go, and you get the money back way sooner. I've done it twice, and that is the

Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Caiman - the boat engine is started at least once every two weeks. I try to shoot for once a week. And most of the time I pull the fuel line off the engine and let it run dry. But still - parts go bad. I know someone who tinkers with outboards.

Beanie - I am too cheap to pay for tax software. And I am too cheap to pay someone to do my simple taxes for me. And I am too cheap to pay for electronic filing. And I do not trust the "free" e-file sites. And when you e-file it is less work for the IRS. Well SCREW THAT! Let them process my paper form. I will get my return in two to three weeks.

Anonymous beanie said...

did you see the 4th episode of the mighty mac? I don't think it was up when you looked


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