Beer Makes Me Pee

So I watched Salo. I found this movie by following some link that led to "the top 10 most disturbing movies". So I looked for more lists. Salo was one of the movies that kept popping up.

It is based on the works of the Marquis de Sade. It is not from any of his works, as the movie takes place in WWII era Italy.

Well - all I can say is that Marquis de Sade was one twisted person. A group of people of wealth and power have some teens rounded up and abducted. They can do this because they are wealthy and powerful. The captors are then subjected to whatever whims the abductors care to indulge in with them.

And then they are tortured and killed. And I do mean tortured.

Now it is just a movie. Not real and all. But still - it is a graphic film. And it is somewhat disturbing. Not for everyone.

By the way, the list said Eraserhead is the number 1 most disturbing movie. So that is on the list too. Just to see what the fuss is all about really.

In other news - I could not resist myself and I bought some LED christmas lights. I got two strings, I need at least one more. Well "need" is an interesting word. I really did not "need" anything.

However they are here. I will finish hooking them up tomorrow. Or the next day. Whenever I get around to it. It should only take a few minutes.

And then Ill attempt to take a photo of the results. My camera is pretty shitty in low light conditions, so the photos may be crappy. But what can I do?

Well, I could go out and buy a professional Nikon digital camera that is good up to some crazy high ISO like 6400 or something - but that would require spending some $2,500 just for the camera body. Too rich for my blood!!! I could go pro-sumer from Nikon and it would only set me back about $1,000 for the camera - and I might even get a lens. But again - way beyond my humble needs.

And with that - December is here. Or will be tomorrow. A crazy time of the year. I hope I have enough rum.

My Christmas List

Caving into rampant consumerism, and having had survived Black Friday (I remained far away from the stores,) - here is my 2008 Christmas list, complete with a handy price estimation guide.

1. Yeti 45 quart "Tundra" cooler ($245)

2. Green "double long" underwater lights from All Marine LED - wires out of the top please. $190 each, I need two.
3. Netflix player by Roku ($99).

4. A 1080p LCD TV. If I am going to get a blu-ray DVD player then Ill need a TV to go along with it. I do not require a huge screen. I think that the 1080p sets start at around 32 inches or so. I do not know how much they cost - as I have not looked at any for some time now.

5. Sony Playstation 3 with either the 80gb ($399) or 160gb hard drive ($499). Really only needed if I get a 1080p TV. Otherwise - Ill pass. It will get used more as a Blu-Ray DVD player than a game console anyway.

Now we need to get a little bit HIGH TECH here.

6. Humminbird 797 c2i SI combo NVB ($1,100). This bad boy is a side imaging sonar unit, with a built in GPS (internal antenna) AND Navionics Gold & HotMaps charts pre-loaded. This unit is so expensive because of the side scanning sonar feature. It gives a photographic like view of the bottom. No other consumer sonar is doing this. The step up is a thing you tow behind a boat that costs tens of thousands just for the unit. Then you need the computers and screens and all that shit.

7. Humminbird "WeatherSense" Barometer ($60).

8. Fine beer. Single bottles are OK, as are 6 packs - either all the same or mixed. Price varies. I prefer porters, stouts, pale ales, and so on. Abby Ales are usually top notch. Lambics - I do not really know about. So those are best gifted as single bottles. The Sam Adams "lambic" is horrible. They put maple syrup in the shit. Maple syrup and beer is just a terrible idea. The other winter Sam Adams seasonals are good.

Well that is about all I can think up for now. I am sure I could add more stuff if I tried. But for now this is plenty.

Black Friday Survival Tips

I do not understand the obsession with Black Friday. Sure, there are teaser sale prices on some items.

But that is a SCAM. They will advertise something like a Blue-Ray DVD player for $50. Pretty good deal huh? Well it is. And here is where the SCAM comes in. There are only 15 units in the store for that price. Once they are gone you can still get that Blue-Ray DVD player. For $350.

That or there is a stack of DVD players at Wal-Mart for $20. I mean a massive stack. A whole truckload arrive. And then this happens.



And for what? Some shitty ass CHEAP AS HELL DVD player that will break in a month anyway? And if it does not break - it is going to skip if there is so much as a speck of dust on the disk.

Do yourself a favor. Stay home. Don't bother. Idiots that are already lined up at the stores are going to get the teaser price shit. Trust me - they are out there now. Lined up. In the cold. In the rain. In the freezing rain. They do not care.

Because they are idiots.

And when the door opens, the slower moving idiots will end up as floor mats. For someone else to wipe their feet on.

Mark these words - SOMEONE WILL GET TRAMPLED TO DEATH. Or at least trampled to a coma.

Bones will be broken, old ladies will be thrown the the floor, people will end up in the emergency room, and so on.

Over a $25 DVD player.

Well - I will not be trampled. I have a concealed weapons permit. Trample me and Ill bust a cap in yo ass. Because THAT is the American way! I guess.

But more to the point - I do not plan to be anywhere near a retail outlet today.

I may be dumb, but I am not crazy.

If you do plan to be near a store today, I suggest watching The Road Warrior (Mad Max 2) first. To get you into the proper frame of mind. It is everyone for themselves. If you happen to see an old lady on the floor - trample her ass. Stopping to help is for the weak. Stopping to help means that 300 pound person behind you will NOT stop (once they get moving they can't stop even if they want to). So you end up getting pushed down, where you are then trampled. And nobody is going to help you.

It is not a day for the weak of heart. You have to be ruthless. Keep your eyes on the prize. nothing else matters. Anyone who goes down is finished. You can not help them.

There is too much violence, too much pain. Just walk away.

Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Unless you live someplace where there is no Thanksgiving. In which case, screw you :)

Turkey Pardon

As is tradition, President Bush pardoned a turkey for Thanksgiving.


In Thanksgiving Tradition, Bush Pardons Scooter Libby In Giant Turkey Costume

Reverse Midas Touch

What a piece of SHIT the new Indiana Jones movie was.

Aliens??? Really now. Aliens? Area 51?

Now if you happen to be a South Park fan, you saw the episode "The China Problem", that contains a sub plot where the kids have the police arrest George Lucas and Stephen Spielberg for raping Indiana Jones. I saw the South Park episode before I saw the movie.

Needless to say, I tend to agree with the creators of South Park. Aliens DO NOT belong in an Indiana Jones movie. Kind of like the lost Arc Of The Covenant does not belong in an alien movie.

In other news - this bailout thing is looking like nothing more than another jewel in the Bush Administrations CROWN OF FAILURE. The Bush Administration can not seem to find its own ass - using both hands AND a mirror.

City Group needs to be bailed out. Again. And they got the bailout they need.

But they already got one bailout. And what did they do? They bought Wachovia. They declared dividends for shareholders. They tried to shore up stock values. And they FAILED. So hey - give them more money!

And now it comes out that City Group wants their name plastered all over some stadium. They PAID TO SPONSOR A STADIUM. While asking for bailout money.

Of course, I do not know why people are so shocked over this. The mess is on par for Bush. Remember the war? The weapons of mass destruction? The grave threat? Act now OR ELSE GET NUKED??? So the war was authorized by congress based on these "truths". And when they turned out to be bullshit, the reasons were changed. From "weapons of mass destruction" to "spreading freedom".

And how does that relate to this bailout? The plan pitched to Congress called for the government to buy some "toxic assets" in a reverse auction deal so that the government got the lowest price the banks were willing to take. Once the bad assets were off the bank books, the bad mortgages could be refinanced. And then once the bad was made good - the government could sell them back to the banks. The government was also going to buy stocks or some such shit - but because we are not "socialist" the government would not buy shares with voting rights, or otherwise mess with the all mighty bank boards of directors.

So Congress said "well we do not really like this plan, but we can live with it. It is better than nothing". So they approved it.

And then what happened? Vast sums were handed out. Just given away. Need money?? HERE YOU GO!! Take it!

And the toxic assets? What happened to those?

Nothing.

And bank stocks? How many of those were bought by the government?

Apparently none.

Is there any oversight on the boards of directors?

Nope. Because that shit is "socialist" or "communist" or whatever.

Does the government have ANYTHING to show for the money handed out?

Nope. Not a single thing. The grand plan was a LIE. Bullshit. Not going to happen.

And that is why it is another jewel in the crown of failure.

So with no (or at best very little) oversight as to how the money is used - should be be surprised that banks in trouble used the money to buy up other banks, have their name plastered all over some shitty ass stadium, declare dividends, and otherwise do everything EXCEPT what the money was supposed to be used for?

Well that depends. On one hand there is the insane idea that free markets will ALWAYS do the right thing.

On the other hand, Adam Smith himself said "man is self interested and greedy".

But what the hell does that Marxist communist socialist goofball Adam Smith know? I piss on him and that communist "Wealth Of Nations"book he wrote.

If the government is going to give banks money - THEY BETTER HAVE PEOPLE ON THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS! If the government is going to buy stock, THEY BETTER HAVE VOTING SHARES!

Otherwise the banks get the money, and we get shit.

Everything King Midas touched turned to gold. Well Bush is the opposite of that. If he touches gold it turns into dog shit.

It is simply amazing. But not really. It plays into the idea that if you just trust the self interested and greedy - everything will work out. Somehow. Using magic.

And meanwhile - as of right now - taxpayers have NOTHING, and I do mean NOTHING, to show for the money spent on the bank bailouts. There is NOTHING being held by the government that can be sold back later to recover the money.

If this was the sales pitch given to Congress - there is no way it would have passed.

Mega Oh Shit

Can you say "oh shit"???


Massive Yacht Collision and Destruction - Watch more free videos

Google Bombing For Admiral Bob

Admiral Bob needs your help. Sort of. Not really actually.

But if you are cool, and I know you are or else you would not be reading this - you can help out Admiral Bob by including a link to his site on your blog or webpage or whatever the crap you happen to have. You may even put the link in the comments section of your favorite other blog that gets a bazillion comments daily.

And no, spreading the word about the Miami legend Admiral Bob is NOT "spamming". It is providing a public service. For you see, many people are under the mistaken impression that the County is run by Mayor Carlos Alvarez and the goon squad also known as the Board Of County Commissioners.

WRONG! Those hacks are just the face people. Admiral Bob is really the one calling the shots.

EXCEPT for the bad shots. The decisions made by the goon squad that make this place a dump. And what would these decisions include? Well lets just start with this years public schoolbudget shortfall. Which just happens to be almost the exact same amount being PISSED AWAY building a brand new sandbox for some shitty ass baseball team to play with balls in. Now Admiral Bob would probably redirect the stadium funds to the schools - because that is how Admiral Bob rolls.

But the elected goons feel otherwise. So if you happen to live in Miami-Dade County and your child's favorite program is getting axed - you can explain to them that at least a bunch of grown men can keep playing with balls and get paid millions a year to do so.

But be that as it may, it is not Admiral Bob's doing.

So now - without further delay - pour yourself some Brugal Anejo and check out Admiral Bob's site. And do not forget to out links EVERYWHERE to Admiral Bob, so that Google will pick up Admiral Bob and put his site before all the other IMPOSTER Admiral Bob websites out there.

That by the way is an order from Admiral Bob.

Frivolous Friday

Well I got a whole lot done!!!

And by "a whole lot" I mean I managed to watch all three movies I just got. I sent them back already. I should get three more Saturday. A documentary about some of the more famous banned cartoons, one is supposed to be a very disturbing foreign film based on a book by the Marquis De Sade (so you know it is going to have some twisted shit in it) , and then the new Indiana Jones movie. Because at least one needs to just be something to watch. And the Marquis De Sade movie might suck.

And now........a video of various drunks falling down, doing stupid things, and failing sobriety tests.



Because it is Friday. And the holidays are almost here. So learn from the video - and don't try to do what you see. Nothing good will come from it.

Movies

It occurred to me that I had been sitting on some Netflix movies for a long time. So I watched them. And mailed them in. And I get three more today!!

Actually this happens from time to time. What happened this time was I watched two of the movies, and sat on the third.

Now normal people would have mailed in the two they had watched. But not me. For some reason.

Anyhow - I watched "Lake Of Fire", which was a documentary about the whole abortion thing. It begins and ends with film of a woman having an abortion. And between this footage is the rest of it. Activists from both sides, interviews from people who have shot doctors, people who worked at clinics where doctors were shot, protesters blocking clinics, protesters protesting the other protesters - escorting women into blocked clinics, bioethics discussions, and so on.

Then there was a somewhat dark / strange movie called "Lars And The Real Girl". This sort of strange loner type guy who lives in a small town announces to his brother and his brother's wife that he wants to bring someone over to have dinner. The brother and his wife are happy, as Lars is sort of a recluse loner and all. And then he shows up with a Real Doll - which he orders over the internet. He has this story about her life, has her dressed normally, and so on. Needless to say, everyone in town finds out and thinks the guy has cracked. But they go along with it. He brings the doll places, talks to it, takes it to church, and so on. Although the doll is a sex doll, Lars never uses it for that. Or for its other use - namely scamming the car pool lane. If I had to use highways with a car pool lane during rush hour on a daily basis - I would be tempted to order a doll. Dress it up in work clothes, strap on a seat belt, give it a cell phone, fake the occasional argument, and there you go! Instant scam.

Anyhow - it was a good movie. And not what you think.

The last film was another documentary titled "Why We Fight". It starts off with President Eisenhower's farewell address.



And it goes from there. So, you think Eisenhower was right about his warning in his farewell address? Why do we fight?

The next three movies are not this heavy thinking stuff. Well WALL-E might be, it has a dark tone too. I never saw it - but I know that WALL-E is the last robot left on Earth, working in what amounts to a giant garbage dump - all that remains on the planet after humans totally trash it. The humans left live in a space station, totally dependent on technology. A sorry lot really.

Also on the way is Star Wars: Clone Wars - set in a time frame sometime after the second movie and before the third.

And then there is the third Futurama movie, Bender's Game.

The question now is will I sit on these for months, or will I watch them and send them back in a reasonable amount of time?

And So It Begins

It looks like the first sustained cold snap of the season has begun.

And let me tell you - it is nice. The air outside is crisp and cool. And it will stay this way. Two more cold fronts are on the way.

Hell - it may even get cooler.

This is a very good omen. For me. Because I live in a sub-tropical zone. If you live in a temperate zone - then it is probably very bad news for you.

I hope you like shoveling snow!

Ill have better material soon. This time of year I always get better material. Maybe it is the egg nog.

OK OK it IS the egg nog. I like to kick it up a notch with spiced rum. Or regular rum. Or whatever I have on hand.

Florida Amendment Proposal 2

I predicted something I failed to blog about. As such there is no record of my prediction. OH WELL!

But what I said, and have no proof to back up, is that Florida amendment proposal 2 would be tossed out by courts.

And no, not by those "liberal activist" courts I keep hearing so much about but have never seen myself. And why is it that a court that rules the way the hard right wants is a "court that is strictly interpreting the Constitution", while a court that rules contrary to what the right wants is a "liberal activist" court?

And by the way, if you bother to actually read the Constitution, it states that one of the functions of the courts is a check on the powers of the lawmakers. So courts are SUPPOSED to review laws, and if they have reason to strike them down as unconstitutional then they can. And the ruling can be appealed - all the way up to the supreme court.

Now I realize that judicial review may piss on your parade. But that is just how it is. Don't like it? NO PROBLEM! Take your parade to a country with a different system of laws. I promise not to stop you. And there you will not have to worry about those pesky liberal activists.

Anyhow - I do not see how the courts can not toss out one election result. Amendment 2.

I am sure you have heard of it. Everyone has. With all the protests and all. But just in case you have not heard of it, this measure says that not only is marriage defined as one man and one woman, it goes on to say that no other union can be recognized by law.

And it was passed by voters.

So that is it right? Only a liberal activist court would overthrow election results right???

Now I could go on to talk about Broward County voting, in a public election, to allow Vegas style slot machines - and one Governor Jeb Bush and his clingers on taking every measure they could to undo this measure passed by voters. Screw the courts! They were not going to help. So the State tried its best to make a system where it would be impossible to put a single machine in any horse track. Liberal activisim indeed.

Anyhow, that is not the point. The point here is that Florida voters also passed Jim Crow laws. So - since they were voted in - those were constitutional?

Well some horrible liberal activist courts disagreed.

Amendment 2, in my views, crosses the bounds of equal protection under the law. And now Ill take you through my reasoning. If you care.

So marriage is one man and one woman. Nobody is saying people can not get married. Right? So there is no problem! OK then, lets go with this. Lets say marriage is later defined as two men or two women, and no other union would be legally recognized.

Would THAT be OK?? You can still get married after all! Just not to someone of the opposite sex. So there is no legal discrimination.

Crazy you say? Maybe. But why would you think that if you do not want to marry someone of the same sex, someone who is gay really wants to marry someone of the opposite sex?

Argument 2 is that it would would cause morality to collapse, and it would be tought in public schools that being OK is perfectly fine.

I would make the case that capitalism is a much bigger threat to morality. We even soiled God by connecting him to something as dirty as money. In God We Trust huh? Taking that off our money would also "destroy morality"! Well then before 1864 this must have been one hell of an immoral place - because 1864 was the first time these words appeared on any US currency. And it was not till 1956 that it became the "motto" of the USA.

By the way, 1956 was also about the same time "under God" was added to the pledge.

And since 1956 - morality is WAY UP!! Good thing congress passed those laws!

What is really killing morality, and causing divorce, is capitalism. Money. At least this is the way I see it. Why rob the 7-11? MONEY! And with that money you can buy things.

What is "success"? Is it a happy family? Oh hell no! Success is a $60,000 car. Success is a house full of new things. Success is a closet full of clothes that are the latest style. Success is a $5,000 television. Success is how much money you have, what your net worth is.

NOWHERE is the consumerism version of success do things like "happiness" come into play. Can you sell happiness? NOPE! Then it is WORTHLESS!

I think this is one reason why divorce is so prevalent. It is easier to split up than work things out. It may even be cheaper to split up than work things out. Plus, why should a man who schieves "success" not have a young hot girlfriend? He can afford her after all! And if he can also afford the divorce - well guess what?

And I have news for you all. As a product of public schools, I can tell you this. Back in the 80s if you beat up some kid because you thought they were gay - your ass was expelled. Gone. No questions. If you were asked "what started the fight" and you said "gay boy over there was acting like a fag" then you were going to be removed from the school in handcuffs.

Because violence is not acceptible in school.It has nothing to do with "teaching that being gay is acceptible". It is not like teaching kids that it is NOT ok to beat someone up because of what you think they are.

Marriage is nothing more - and this is a big one - NOTHING MORE than a legal contract. I know that some will have a shit fit over this - but you DO NOT HAVE TO INVOLVE ANY RELIGION to be married. Really. You can decice to have a religious service if you like, but no state requires this.

So marriage is a secular thing. You just go to the court house, fill out some paperwork, fork over a few bucks, and thats it. You can sign the papers in front of a clerk of the court acting as a witness, and then you are married.

On the other hand, if you DO NOT get the paperwork from the courts - you can have all the church services you want. Legally - it will not mean diddly squat.

And for what it is worth, I know two married couples that did not have any church service. They walked into the courthouse, and an hour or so later were married.

BOTH marriages are doing just fine. One couple has been together for something like 15 or 16 years - the other for closer to about 4 or 5 years.

I lost count of the people I know who did the whole church thing and later got divoriced.

So much for that huh?

But gay marriage cheapens marriage!!

Really? You think that? Well if gay people getting married cheapens marriage - what does divorce do? Strengthen marriage?

So then if we are going to be so concerned about things that cheapen marriage - lets OUTLAW DIVORCE!! ONE man and ONE woman. Forever. Pick someone, marry them, and no matter what happens there is no divorce.

I bet that ballot measure would be defeated 100% to 0%. You think the Mormon church would dump millions into passing that one?

No, that would be crazy. Few would go along with that.

And no, I do not care if two people of the same sex want to get married. It does not change who I am. I do not define my relationships by the acts of other people. If you do - well then I hope you can get help.

Actually - I question your sexuality if you really think that gay marriage is a "threat". To whom is it a threat to? Not to me! I do not see that at a threat at all.

If you do see it as a threat - here is what I think. I think you may have gotten married just to cover up who you really are. You thought that by getting married, you would be "normal". And you also know that if you could, you would leave your spouce for your secret boyfriend / girlfriend. If you had to live a lie - then everyone else like you should be forced to as well.

Otherwise - nothing else makes sense. At least not to me. I know that I will not suddenly decide to be gay. I do not care if gays can get married, or even if they are given wonderful prizes after they are married. Likewise I think that anyone who does "decide" to be gay was already gay - and would continue to be gay even if it were illegal.

If you are gay then you are gay. If you are not then you are not. NOTHING is going to really change that. I do not care what insanity chicks drive me through, I have never EVER thought "well you know, I should give this man love thing a shot". Never. So therefore, it does not make a lot of sense to me for a gay man to suddenly decide to switch teams either.

And if it really is a "choice", as some maintain - who the hell would decide to make a choice to be someone who would be excluded from society? Why make the choice to be someone who could get the shit beat out of them just for walking down the street? This is a crazy concept to me.

And like I said, applied to my life - if being gay is really a choice - then at some point it stand to reason we all had to decide if we wanted to be straight or gay. Do you ever remember making such a choice? Well neither go I. I never remember sitting down with a peice of paper, divided in half, writing down the merits of either choice, and then arriving at a conclusion.

No, it was more of a matter of starting junior high, and then suddenly noticing chicks. About 30 seconds later I noticed how little of a shit I gave about what the math teacher was saying. Math was suddenly a LOT more boring than it usually was.

If my view, this is a fucked up situaton. Seperate and not equal was written back into the Florida Constitution. Equal protection under the law was removed.

So no, I do not think the courts can ignore this.

Space Shuttle

So I saw the Space Shuttle launch today. It was pretty cool. I was at the boat club, and when the thing lifted off I looked north.

And there in the sky - some 300 or so miles away - a plume of fire was visible in the night sky.

Due to the distance, there was no sound. But I could see the fire from the engines. I watched it go till it was just a speck in the sky, barely visible.

It was cool.

Before they stop flying the shuttle I want to get to the space center and watch a lift off from closer.

Florida Keys

I have determined that the missing keys are somewhere in Florida. So this limits my search area somewhat.

But today I will be able to spend a good portion of the day searching. I plan to search everything and everywhere. Because I need the blasted things for this weekend.

If not then plan B. Ill need a drill for the trailer lock. Maybe the Sawz All. The Sawz All is the best power tool ever. If you have something that needs to be cut apart - the Sawz All is for you.

In other news - there is no other news. Things are quiet and very boring here.

I hope I can find the keys. Otherwise - what a mess.

Lost Marbles. And Other Things.

Sunday was fun.

See there was going to be a boat mission. One where I get free gas out of the deal. Well not exactly "free" gas - only enough free gas to replace whatever was used for the mission. But I call it "free" to make the deal sound better.

But that is not the important part.

I was getting things all ready to go. Gathering up the electronics, getting all my shit together, and so on.

Then I went outside to hitch the trailer to the truck.

Backed the truck up so the towing ball was under the trailer coupler.

Then got out of the truck to unlock the coupler lock.

Where the fuck are the keys??

PROBLEM.

No keys. Not in the truck. Could not find shit in the house. Nothing in various pants pockets. Nothing in the electronics bag.

So after searching high and low for the cursed keys, I gave up. Mission canceled.

I still have not found those buggers. They are around here somewhere. I need to locate them. Soon.

Not knowing where they are is starting to drive me crazy.

And if I can't find them? Well then it gets fun!!!! Here is what will have to be replaced.

1. The boat ignition.
2. The electronics box lock
3. The trailer tongue lock (which will have to be cut off).
4. Spare tire lock.
5. Other shit I am forgetting about, but will remember about / discover while 5 miles off the reef line looking for fish I can't catch anyway.

I just pissed Fred off and the bastard let me know. With his teeth. If you piss Fred off he bites. The more you pissed he is, the harder / longer he bites. If he is only a little pissed then its just a nip. If he is really REALLY pissed he draws blood. If you do something and he is not pissed or forgives you, then he will lick your hand.

So that is what I have been putting up with. Lost boat keys, and a fat orange cat who does not want me to move at all if he is laying next to me.

I was out with some friends Monday night. The place we were at was doing some lame promotion and giving away free shit nobody really wants.

I got a Budweiser key chain.

The irony did not pass over anyone's head.

Enforcing Stereotypes

Enforcing stereotypes is wrong. So if you happen to be a member of a group beset with stereotypes, do something about it. Take action to AVOID enforcing them. It is all up to you.


See, in this example the police should NOT have gone to Donutland. Go to I-Hop. Go to Denny's. Go to a Waffle House.

Or else send one undercover cop in an unmarked car to load up, then drive back to the station.

And what happens if you stubbornly refuse to take proactive measures to avoid playing into stereotypes? This happens.


And you have nobody to blame but yourself.

Skipper Update

I had a boring post about the stock market and shit written - but that is gone now.

In its place is a Skipper update.

When I last mentioned Skipper, he had to go to the vet because he was scratching himself up. So I did that. I suspected an allergy to something - most likely fleas.

The vet seems to agree. Fleas are a common cat allergy. And really, the fleas are pretty easy to get rid of.

So the vet gave Skipper a shot to stop the itching and excessive licking, chewing, and scratching that creates.

And then I got enough flea-be-gone for two months. That means 8 tubes of stuff, as there are 4 cats here. All the cats had to get the stuff. It is applied once a month and kills adult fleas in 12 - 24 hours. It also kills flea eggs.

No fleas, or evidence of fleas, were found on Skipper. But there was a flea sighting on Fred the fat orange cat.

Now if there ARE fleas and they are causing the problem - by now the goop has killed the adults. Any fleas that hatch will be killed after they bite a cat. Hopefully NOT skipper - they can bite one of the other cats.

The way this stuff works is really amazing. Ill use it for a few months - then stop. The theory being once the fleas are gone then you do not need to keep using it. And that works. Once out of the house and yard it takes a long time for the bugs to return.

But Skipper never takes things well. With the other cats it is easy. You put the stuff on their neck, where it can not be licked. Then be done with it.

Skipper figured out he could reach the back of his neck with one of his feet. Then he licked the foot. And then started to drool. And lick himself more. The first time he got into the goop I got all worried and called the vet and was told not to worry about it. So now I do not worry about it.

The shot will last for about 2 weeks. Two weeks of itch relief. Already he is starting to look better. Raw spots where he scratched himself to the point of removing skin are getting better. His mouth area is less puffy.

Hopefully in two weeks the fleas, if they are here, will be gone. And then things will be OK.

If things to not get better - well then it might not be fleas. And then the fun part begins. Trying to figure out what the hell else it could be.

And The Winner Of Dumbass Of The Day Is.......

Some ass clown who tried to rob a small pharmacy down the street from my place.

Apparently, the genius had a foolproof plan. A plan that would never attract any attention.

See he decided that he would crash his truck through the pharmacy door. Nobody would notice that. Old people are CONSTANTLY driving into buildings here. Every day, some lucky business gets a free drive up window installed. Even if they do not want one.

Oh yea - the pharmacy was also open. The door was not locked. So there was no need to create all this noise and shit by driving your truck into a building.

But what makes today's winner such a dumb ass is where the pharmacy was. Across the street from - you are not going to believe this one - a DUNKIN DONUTS shop! You read that one right.

Witnesses to the crash went into the Dunkin Donuts, where low and behold - two Florida Highway Patrol officers were getting some grub and coffee.

Imagine that. Cops in a Dunkin Donuts. I would have never guessed that was a possibility.

The cops put down the coffee, and went across the street. There they saw King Dumbass in the process of robbing the pharmacy. They saw him run out of the pharmacy, and get into his truck. They told him to get out of the vehicle, but apparently he tried to start the engine or otherwise get away.

So one of the cops busted the drivers side window, then shot his ass. Well maybe not his ass, but some part of his body got shot. He was taken off to the trauma center, where he was last listed as critical condition.

The whole story, with video, is here.

http://cbs4.com/local/Police.involved.shooting.2.857676.html

DUMBASS! Don't rob a place next to a Dunkin Donuts! There are ALWAYS cops in that place! You must have failed criminal 1st grade.

For your sheer stupidity, you win the title of Dumbass Of The Day. You also win some copper coated lead. Congratulations!

Normal

Well - back to normal life.

The sun was out, it was a nice cool day, and there were only regular commercials on the TV. It was actually a really nice day here.

In addition to this Skipper The Cat has decided that he is not getting enough attention, or costing enough money. In response to this he became allergic to something. Maybe food, maybe fleas - who knows. But he is scratching the shit out of himself. There is a place on his neck where he scratched himself raw, He has scratched his ears, he licks himself a lot creating thin hair spots, his lips are puffy, and there is a spot on his chin that is scratched as well.

Great. He would have made a lousy alley cat. Good thing he ended up living here.

A lone flea was spotted on Fred. So it is possible the fleas are back. I use the anti-flea stuff, but once the fleas are gone I stop using it. I figure the fewer chemicals I use on the cats the better. Plus it saves a few bucks.

Anyhow Skipper has to see the vet today. He will get a shot that will make him stop scratching and licking himself. And I suppose that Ill get more of that once a month flea stuff. And Ill hope it is actually fleas he is allergic to.

So that will be fun. Skipper LOVES to go for car rides. He howls the whole way, in a very frantic fashion. Turning the stereo up is futile. He will only shut up if I stick my fingers through the door of the cat carrier. But then I have to drive down the road, one hand contorted so it is behind me with my fingers stuck in a cat cage door - leaving only one other hand for steering.

Making turns is fun. I have to use my knees.

Luckily for me, I have experience using my knees to steer. Do not ask why, that is another crazy story. But it really helps if you need to do something else while driving. Like for example, eat a cheeseburger. Or read a road map. Or look for something you lit on fire then dropped on the floorboard of the car. Or whatever.

Anchor Steam Brewery makes a darn good porter. Just throwing that out there. Sierra Nevada Brewing Company also makes a darn good porter. Ill have to get more of the Anchor Steam stuff and compare it head to head with the Sierra Nevada to determine which is better. It will be a close call.

I got a fishing spy report. Someone caught TWO dolphin. Dolphin! this time of year? I thought it was over for dolphin till next summer. Guess not! So I need to try to get out there so I can continue my streak of not catching anything.

When I go fishing, the fish are safe.

It is also getting VERY CLOSE to everglades season. But nobody wants to go to Shark Valley. It is only a 14 mile bike ride on pavement! That is not too bad. My lazy ass can do it. So what is their problem?

America Has Spoken

Congratulations Senator Obama. To be honest, I never thought I would see anything like this ever happen. But this is America - and in America anything is possible. In this great land, there are no limits. There is no impossible. Nobody can say this is not true anymore.


Here is to the next 4 years.

Election Day

Election day is here. It is kind of strange to have just typed that, seeing as how the election has been going on for some 2 years now. They said on TV who the first guy to file the papers required to run for President was, but I forgot who that was. It was only a week or two after the 06 elections were over.

But the TV ads are still around. For at least one more day. Less actually. I do not think I will be seeing any more once the polls close in FL - unless I am watching a cable channel.

And the ads are getting desperate! Wright is back! Only now the 20 second audio clips that they used to play over and over are shaved down to 5 second audio clips. Cutting out all the crap, and only playing the good stuff.

I guess Republicans have ADD, and can not sit through the 20 second clips anymore? Who knows.

And they want to forget about how their own crazy ass people - such as Falwell, Robertson, Hagee, and so on - have said all kinds of fun America hating stuff. Like predicting God would destroy major cities because of "the gays", that the flood of New Orleans was ordained by God, that Dover Pennsylvania have it coming because they somehow kicked God out of science class by not teaching creationism - and so on.

And then there is the horrible specter of socialism! And we can not have that in America. Because America is NOT about socialism.

Fine. You know what? FINE! And let this be known. Many of the perpetually red states are states with low incomes. Not that the people are dumb, it is just that in places like Alabama and Mississippi and so on the cost of living is lower. A million dollars will buy a whole lot of land and a big ass home. In Miami - a million bucks buys a very nice home in a very nice area - but not exactly a huge plot of land. You can probably live better on $50,000 in Mississippi than you can on $200,000 in New York City. It is all about cost of living.

So all you anti socialists in "real America" know this. Your states are funded with pork. Where do you think the money for your interstate highways comes from? How about bridges? Water treatment plants? Sewage plants?

Ill tell you where SOME of that money comes from - tax payers in other states. States with a higher tax base. So lets take all the states and divide them up into red and blue. The "blue" states tend to be the states with higher property values, higher incomes, higher populations, and therefore a higher tax base.

Which is then redistributed to you.

So small town America - lets say your town has a population of 15,000 people. And lets assume half of those people work. So that is 7,500 income earners. And then lets say your town needs a $25 million water treatment / sewage treatment plant. I hope you are ready to PAY FOR IT YOURSELF!! It would only be a tax of $3,334 per income earner in that case.

By the way, if the population is 15,000 and only half the people work - that means that nobody has kids. You just have one person working for money, and one at home taking care of things there. If you assume each family has one income earner and one child - and nobody is retired or on disability or whatever - then you can cut that number back and the tax share up.

And do not worry about "socialists" like me. I live in an area with about 2 or 3 million people. But what the hell, lets assume 1 million. And lets assume that half work. And we need a $25 million water treatment plant upgrade. Well thats only $50 per income earner, and that number assumes only 500,000 people are working. There are more than 500,000 employed people in Miami.

So the big cities will be fine under your system. Big cities have the population and tax base to afford such things as roads and bridges and clean water. It is the small town rural populations that will be shit out of luck there.

Still think "socialism" sounds bad? I do. To be honest, I am tired of my tax money leaving my local area to pay for your shit.

If "pork" was really cut from the budget, and there was no federal money for state or local projects, guess what? Pooer states would fall apart. Only wealthy cities would have paved roads. Only wealthy areas would have sewage treatment, or clean water. America would look and smell like India.

No offense to India.

What gets me is that so many people in small towns have bought into the bullshit. So I say to you, if you live in small town rural America - be careful what you wish for. You may get it.

And then there are taxes! Oh no! One guy is going to raise taxes and kill small business! The question I have about that is where is the evidence in this? Where is the evidence that the Bush tax cuts helped small business? I am seeing small business closing shop here. And where are all these jobs I keep hearing so much about?

This is also insane. Business is NOT going to expand unless there is, and here is where I go off the socialist deep end, INCREASED DEMAND FOR PRODUCTS OR SERICES. That is what makes business expand. Owners see that by expanding, they can make more money by capturing more of the market share.

Well right now there is not an increased demand for products and services. People are cutting back. Weather is it increased energy costs, increased food cost, lack of credit, excessive debt, or even that uncertian feeling that your job is not secure - people are cutting back on the spending.

Meaning less demand for products and services.

Meaning less reason for small business to expand.

By the way - who benefits? Well see that sign in the picure I put up? I took that picture. And yes, that is $40 to park. A little furhter down the road (closer to the boat show) parking was $60. Now if your small business is running a boat show parking lot then yea, tax cuts for the top may help you out. But really - people that were going to the show to buy a yacht would pay the $40 parking fee with or without a tax cut.

No, what seems logical and reasonable to me is to target the middle for the tax cuts. This way custmers of small business MIGHT have some more money to spend. And then they MIGHT hire a plumber to fix a leak, as opposed to just turning off a valve and declaring the leaky toilet off limits - so everyone has to use the other bathroom. And why do that? It saves a couple of hundred bucks. Which can be used for other things.

Or better yet, people MIGHT have the money to obtain a new major appliance or two. Which means retail sales. Which may also mean delivery and setup.

And which would mean a small plumbing business might have more customers. And then have a reason to expand, in order to provide better service to their growing custmer base.

As the wealth is spread, and the tax cuts are spent, money circulates. Cash flow is the LIFEBLOOD of business. And once the heart of business is pumping blood again, and not just air, people will feel more secure in their jobs. And then may decide that it is OK to add on that extra bathroom to the house. Or remodel the kitchen. Ot buy a new car. Or whatever.

OH WAIT! I forgot, I am supposed to be "socialist" and hate business! I forgot.

I take all that back. Business WILL expand even if there are no customers in sight.

These are crazy times. Ill admit that. There are all kinds of things going on in the world. But really, to me this election cycle is a puzzle. There is no single strategy that will always work for the economy or national security. But in this case, I have made a choice which road to try out for the next few years.

I do not feel safer from the threat of terrorism. I know my economic situation could be improved. One side is proposing to try differnt strategies, the other side is pretty much just saying the same shit - even if that side was opposed to much of the shit years ago.

And that had a great deal to do with my choice.

If that makes me a socialist - fine. Ill live with that.

And if you live in a debtor state, demand that your representatives and senators not bring home one single penny of pork. Then demand that your state raise your sales tax, or even start (or raise) the state income tax, to pay for your own projects. Because socialism sucks.

Remember - be careful what you wish for, you may get it.

FLIBS

Well the boat show was pretty cool. I went to the "big ass boats" section of the show. And there were some BIG ASS BOATS!

There were some yachts for sale that would qualify as a cruise ship. Shit that was at least 150 - 200 feet in length. Boats that would need at least 18 feet of water JUST TO FLOAT!

The "small" boats were over 30 feet. At least in this section of the show. It was something else. I do not usually go to the big ass boats section.

Seeing as how I do not have a few million laying around collecting dust.

But I did get something. I am always discovering things the boat is missing. Like for example, this thing. It is the Cobra MR F300 BT. What is it? Glad you asked. It is a totally waterproof bluetooth enabled device. You pair it to your phone, and then you can send and receive phone calls without taking out your cell. So the cell phone remains safe and happy somewhere that is protected from the elements. Like for example the waterproof pelican box. When someone calls, I can use the microphone thing to answer it. And if it gets wet? No big deal.

Now this is cool. I guess. I tested it out and it works. Not too well in VOX mode but it works well if you use it like a microphone. Used like a radio mic, you can not talk and hear at the same time. But oh well.

The phone can now remain in the electronics box, safe and dry, connected to a cigarstte plug charger - and the bluetooth mic goes somewhere on the helm, waiting for a call.

And if I do not want to take a call - just turn the darn thing off. Or press the red phone botton and send it to voice mail.

I got a "boat show price" on the thing, which was about $30 off list price. Not bad.

I took a few photos at the show before the camera battery croaked - they will be up tomorrow.