Diagram

Some readers seem to have missed my point about the trend to move stuff offshore. Yes, I understand that capitalism is all about exploitation of resources - and the last cheap resource left is third world labor. But it is really good for us?

Imports subtract from the GDP equation. So what happens if the exporters decide to suddenly jack up prices without warning? Will salries in the USA instantly rise to match the increase in prices? And if this happens, will that not trigger run away inflation? And if wages do not match sudden jumps in price from forigen suppliers, who will buy all the consumer goods needed to keep the bull market full of....uhhhh...bull?

And what happens if the next war between the east and west is not fought with bombs? What if the next war is fought along economic lines? Who can hold out longer, the USA or China? And say we just nuke em. Is that really a good idea if we depend on their factories for all out stuff?

All these are questions that economic theory does not really take into consideration, because the theory assumes that everyone just wants to make a whole lot of money. Right now that is what China is doing. But sooner or later they might want power to match that wealth. And who will they take on? Not Scotland. Not The Netherlands. Not France. They will lock horns with the USA. There is no economic theory that takes into account an irrational power grab. but knowing human nature, is it unreasonable to think that such a power move might happen?

These are just some concerns I have. People are too busy doing the rat race thing to get out of the hamster running wheel and look around. Or maybe they just do not want to think about it.

Crazy Plates

First off, I would like to thank DDDragon for the license plate generator link. This post would not have been possible without it. I would have probably written about how the economic system we know today can not possibly last much longer without collapsing in on itself and emerging as something totally different.

Now as an alert driver in South Florida, I see a whole lot of license plates. Depending on the time of year, the plates I see can be from almost anywhere.

Take this one for example. You see a whole lot of them every winter.

The plates are commonly seen on RV type vehicles, driven by old people trying to get away from the snow. When you see this plate in front of you, you can expect the vehicle to go at least 20 mph UNDER the posted speed limit. If you are on the highway, expect the vehicle to be in the passing lane. I do not speak french, but I think the slogan translates into "buy me souvineers". And yes, as you can see by the plate number they DO NOT TIP. I guess they spend so much in gas to drive from Canada to South Florida that they think it is OK for them to be cheap. If you work in the service business near a place where RVs with these plates park for the winter, it sucks. They croud out the locals, and they do not tip. But they DO complain, and they steal all the Sweet N Low packets from the table.

I also sometimes see these plates

Why on Earth anyone from Mississippi would want to come to South Florida is beyond me. Nobody in South Florida wants to go to Mississippi. I know this better than most, because I am forced to go to Mississippi from time to time (I have extended family that live there). The extended family almost NEVER come here, for some reason I have to go there. 99.999% of the time when I see Mississippi plates, they are on cars whose drivers I am related to in some way - but on at least one occasion I saw a plate on a car driven by a stranger. I figure the person was horribly lost, and was looking for Mobile Alabama. Or maybe a good dentist.

Once, I even saw a plate like this one

At first, I thought nothing of it. But then it hit me - how did a car with a Hawaii plate get to South Florida? Is there some kind of crazy bridge connecting Hawaii to California now? I could understand if the car was something expensive, but it was just another old crappy car. It was not new, it was not classic, it was not exotic, it was just another 10 year old Chevy 4 door car. Why did the person ship it? Why not just sell it in Hawaii, then buy another old car here? I can not imagine that the person would have lost anything this way, between the money they could have sold the car for and the money they spent shipping the car to California then the amount spent driving it to FL (unless they paid even more to have it shipped to FL via the Panama Canal) - you would think that they could have at least bought a used Honda. If I were going to move to Hawaii I do not think I would pay to have my vehicle shipped over, and it is fairly new (2002).

Then there are plates from this state

Every time I see a plate from this state, it is attached to some very large truck. Usually the large truck is one of those things with 6 wheels (dualie truck). Do you have to drive a gas sucking beast when you go on vacation? Are you aware that you can rent a car that uses up less than 1/4 of the gas your truck uses? Not only do you save a good deal of money (that you can then spend having fun), but you put the miles on someone elses car. If the rental car gets damaged, destroied, stolen, or it breaks - you just make a phone call and get a new one! Renting cars rules. If you are moving here I can understand bringing your truck - those things cost a lot of money. But I do not think that Texas plate vehicle owners are moving here, because these plates are seasonal. You see more of them in the winter than the summer.

I have never seen one of these plates (at least not that I can remember)

Does anyone live here, other than Bigfoot?

Then, there are the plates I see EVERY DAY. Here is a random example.

Drivers in Miami are terrible. This is just another reaosn to rent a car if you have to come here. I know people that go to their cars to use the phone! Everyone knows at least one person who will start a phone call within 3 minutes of starting their engine. Then they stay on the phone till they get to where they are going. Hell, I would not be too shocked to learn that people are sending faxes while driving. This would not be a problem, except that in Miami people can not drive with BOTH hands on the wheel - so imagine the chaos created when people drive with only one hand on the wheel, while the other hand dials the phone.

And of course, there is my plate. I put this plate on my boat trailer, just to see what people would say about it. So far the boat only has three bullet holes in the transom.

Now do not get me wrong, I am all for conservation. But really, what use is the manatee? They used to keep canals unclogged, but now the canals are locked off so they can not swim up them anymore. All that manatees do is serve as speed bumps for boats. The sooner that they are gone, the sooner all those "manatee slow zone" signs can be removed from the waterways.

And finally, my computer gave me this error message. Anyone know what could have caused it?

More outsourcing woes.

The other day I decided I needed more jeans. I was down to two wearable pairs. So off to the store I went.

I happen to like Levis. They hold up really well. A pair can last years, unless you are a dumbass and spill bleach, battery acid, or PVC glue on them. The battery acid is the worst, all bleach does is leave giant whiteish spots, and PVC glue just looks ugly. Acid makes the fabric about as easy to tear as paper.

Anyway, in case you are not aware Levis used to be made in the USA. One of their plants was in a place called Stonewall Mississippi. When the plant closed, the town all but dried up as Levis was the largest employer in that town. Now the only things there are businesses that can survive off people's welfare checks.

The jeans I got are from The Dominican Republic. I know for a FACT that labor costs went down. Not only do people get paid less, but the company probably does not have to include the benefits package that they did in the USA.

Other costs are probably lower as well. Otherwise, there is no reason to move production offshore.

What did NOT go down is the price. The jeans cost $35 a pair. This is not any cheaper than they cost when they were made right here.

What is going on is GREEDY BASTARDISM. Either Levis, the department store, or BOTH are guilty. If Levis did not lower their cost to retailers, then they moved production offshore - at the cost of American jobs - just so that some suit wearing dildos can make a few more bucks in salary and stock options.

If Levis did lower their cost to stores, but the stores did not lower the cost to the consumer, then the suit wearing anal vibrators are guilty of treason. They probably did not raise employee pay, they just took the extra few bucks and stuffed it into one of their pockets.

At any rate, it is the consumer who has to take it up the cornhole. Not only do taxes have to support almost the entire population of Stonewall Mississippi - but the goods that production was moved offshore to lower cost of are not any cheaper.

Who was the savings passed on to?

Creepy cat movie

Thanks to The Devil Uno for this link. This is one of the best, if not THE BEST, short film I have ever seen. And it is far more creepy than ANY horror flick that Hollywood has produced in a long time, no matter how many hundreds of millions they waste.

Watch, if you dare, The Cat With The Hands. If you have dial up, the file is 6.3 megs. It will play in Windows Media Player or Quicktime. It is worth the wait.

Fixing Social Security - Republican Style

If this does not piss you off, nothing will. Check your pulse, you might already be dead.

We have all been hearing that Social Security is broken. And of course, the Republicans have been saying that they have ALL the answers. We all know about private accounts. But why is the idea not so popular? Obstructionist Democrats thats why!

It has nothing to do with the fact that the more you earn, the more likely you are to opt out of the system, which will mean that those who count on Social Security the most (those with little or no discresionary income to invest) will end up short changed. If you have only a few bucks to set aside for retirement, what is the best move. Put your money in a risk free account, OR go to Vegas and put all your chips on Red 42 (the market)?

Yes, I know that the system is set up to give a larger return to those who earn less. Those at the top of the scale, who have large 401k, Roth IRA, and private pensions already - can not expect better than a break even on Social Security. But so what? Just because some people retire with millions means that other people who work hard all their life have to retire and eat Alpo?

But in case you are my age (early 30s) and you do not care about private accounts - or even support private accounts - think about this.

Republicans ARE TALKING about raising the retirement age to 69. Look it up on Google News yourself. This is their solution, so that people at the top of the income scale can retire with more dollars. Require people to work till they are 69 before they can get full benefits.

Of course, those who earn more money will be able to retire at a reasonable age. They will not really need the Social Security benefits that much.

But lower income workers will be FORCED to work till they drop dead. And if they do work till retirement age, what can they look forward to at age 70? Dream trips to the doctor?

I have a suggestion to the Republicans. Why not just raise Social Security retirement age to 150? That will fix the system. At least as far as the working poor are concerned. Work till you die OR live in poverty.

And if Social Security retirement age goes up, you can bet your ass that companies with pension plans will want to raise the benefit age too. After all, if an employee who pays into the pension plan croaks before they can collect full benefits, the company does not have to shell out the full amount. They get to keep some of it.

Of course those at the top of the income scale could afford to retire at any time. All that keeps the multi millionaires going to work is pure greed. They do not really need their pension, their 401K, or their Social Security. They can afford to just buy bonds and live off the interest - and live pretty high on the hog too.

The rest of us can look forward to a life of servitude, till we die of a heart attack in the office.

Saga of the Mystery Cat Part III, A New Beginning.

Just now, not 5 minutes ago, I heard some meowing outside my window. My little cat (the calico one) is outside right now, so I thought it might be her, or the black mystery cat that showed up a few days ago.

As it turns out, it was yet ANOTHER mystery cat. An orange one. It looks to be the same age as the black mystery cat. I do not know if it is a male or female, it would not let me catch it. It is not totally spooked by people, it just did not want to let me get too close. I think it has been eating the food I leave out for the other cat.

So, I can now conclude the following. Some ASSHOLE has dumped a load of cats on my block.

Saga of the Mystery Cat part II

The mystery cat has not gone away. He hung out in the backyard almost all night. Before I went to sleep at 2 AM I checked the backyard and did not see him. nor did I see him this morning when I went to feed the iguana.

But when I got home from work, he was back. So I fed him again, and provided some water. Right now he is hanging out on top of some old file cabinets on the side of the house, watching the rain.

I do not think he is going to go anywhere.

Do we make ANYTHING in America anymore?

My parents went to Alabama and Mississppi recently. One of my relitaves got hitched. I did not go because I really do not like to go to either Alabama or Mississippi. Plus, I had to work. Getting the time off was not going to be possible, unless I gave up my time in Sanibel (NOT going to happen!).

Anyway, they brought me back a gift from somewhere in Alabama. It was partly a joke, and partly because they seem to think I collect these things (I dont, I just happen to own a large number of them because I use them).

Now this is not the same glass I was given (I can not get the digital camera to focus on the glass), but it is close. My glass says something on it, along with having the Stars And Bars. Part of the joke is the rebel flag, my mom knows how I think when I see old trucks covered in rebel flag stickers (drunken inbred toothless REDNECK throwback to the 1840s).

Anyway, what got my attention was a sticker on the bottom of the glass. MADE IN CHINA. Thats right, Alabama redneck rebel flag shot glasses are made in CHINA!

So, is anything made in America anymore? And if so - what? Obviously not shot glasses.
I stuck the MADE IN CHINA sticker above the rebel flag. It is really funny, in a way. The same Americans who will proudly announce to anyone that will listen that they hate the Chinese buy all their products from China.

Just what I need...

This afternoon, I saw this hanging out in the backyard like he owns the place.

For those of you who do not have cats, let me explain how this works. YOU do not find homeless cats, they find you. They have some kind of mysterious car radar, or maybe there is a giant neon CAT VACANCY sign above your place that only cats can see. Either way, they can and do find you.

This young un-nutted male cat is totally unafraid of the dogs that inhabit the backyard. He does arch up at them, but that is about it. He does not run from them, or even swat at them when they walk up to give the new mystery cat a sniff.

My three cats have mixed feelings about the new cat. Fred HATES the new cat, but he is too much of a chicken to go in the backyard and defend his turf. The girl cats seem to be ignoring the new cat.

The new cat is very friendly. He will let me pet him, and he does not run away from people.

I made the classic MISTAKE of feeding the mystery cat. If he is homeless, he thinks he has a home now. If he belongs to one of the neighbors, he will go home and just return for occasional visits.

The new cat is very skinny for a young un-nutted male cat, but he did not seem to be very hungry. He seems to be in good health, but it would not shock me if he has worms.

So, I will be keeping an eye on the mystery cat. If he hangs out here more often, or seems to not be taken care of....well I guess I will have a new cat.

Which is EXACTLY what I need. Or not.

Last of the Sanibel photos

In order to get ready for my week on Sanibel Island, I have to use up the
pictures I have left. In this post I will do just that! This way, when I go back
to Sanibel this year I can take new pictures and post them. Yes, I will be going
- as it turns out all the hurricane damage was repaired. Unit 156F opened up to
owners about a month ago. I am anxious to get there, I want to see first hand
what Hurricane Charlie did to MY island. I have only seen the island from 200
feet out of a small plane since the hurricane.

Anyway, the picture below is the path that leads to the beach. As you can
see, this picture was taken on a very nice day. Those breakers you see are
happening very close to shore. The breakers in the background are caused by a
sandbar. Beyond the sandbar, there are no whitecaps. The sea this day was pretty
flat. In this picture, you are looking SOUTH. This is one of the unique things
about Sanibel, most barrier islands on the Florida Gulf Coast run parallel to
the mainland. Only Sanibel juts our east to west.

Sanibel is home to a whole lot of wildlife. There are the animals that live
there all year, like the Ibis birds below, but in the winter Sanibel becomes
home to a large amount of migratory birds. I go to the island in the summer, so
all I see are the year round resident critters. These animals include sea gulls,
pelicans, alligators, dolphin (the flipper kind), raccoons, and even the
endangered Spoonbill.

Not all the days are nice. It is actually very uncommon for it to not rain at
least once during the week I am there. I enjoy watching the storms from the
porch of the apartment. The lightning show can be amazing. On the porch, every
rainstorm is announced by a gust of cool wind, the result of the downdraft from
the clouds. When you feel this cool breeze, you know that it is going to rain.
Other times, the storm just floats past the island a few miles offshore. In the
photo below, I am about to be rained on. You can see how the sea has more
white caps. This is because the winds are picking up. I went to the beach just
to snap this photo. Then I started to look for someplace to hang out.

Now the rain is going. You can see that visibility is not so good. In this
photo, the winds are probably gusting to at at least 30 knots (1 knot = 1.15
miles per hour). I took the photo from ground level. There was a lack of
lightning in this storm, just wind and rain. The place I was hanging out at had
the local Doppler radar feed on the TV, so I could see that I was in a "red"
area.

Below is a shot taken of the sea during the height of the weather. Normally,
you would not see any breakers from this view. I was a good distance from the
shore, I had to use all the zoom my digital camera had to take this shot. Those
waves are at least 4 - 6 feet in height, and this is inside the sandbar. Not a
very good time to be out on a boat.

So where was I hanging out for all this? At the pool bar of course! This is a
picture of the business end of the pool bar. As you can see, it is not messing
around. I had a few drinks while I was stranded there due to the rain. See those
trees in the background? Notice anything similar to the trees in the picture
above? The picture above was made with full zoom, the photo below was made with
the lens at wide. My digital camera is pretty good.

Leave me ALONE!

I feel another top 10 list coming on! Any second now! Oh wait, it passed. Nevermind.

FALSE ALARM! It's back! Get ready for the list of..............

Lazy Iguana's top 10 list of reasons why having a place ALL to yourself rules.

10. Walking around nude in the kitchen (DO NOT TRY TO FRY BACON!!!!)
9. Watching TV bare ass naked.
8. No need to wrap a towel around yourself when you get out of the shower.
7. No need to close the bathroom door. EVER!
6. If all you do is pee, flushing is optional. This saves a lot of water.
5. You can watch TV while you use the toilet, because you can leave the bathroom door open.
4. Nobody to bitch about you leaving your dirty laundry on the kitchen floor.
3. When you get home from work, you can toss your pants right in the washer and nobody bitches that it stays there for a week before you actually turn the machine on.
2. Nobody to bitch about how your socks have been in the drier for a week.
1. You can drink beer and eat cold pizza at 3 AM while listening to Pink Floyd in your boxer shorts, toss your shoes anyplace, leave your socks in two different rooms, and generally be a total slob - and NOBODY BITCHES!!!!!!

Transexual co-workers

While doing my daily blog reading, I noticed a comment about strange co-workers. Well, here is my story.

I used to work for an un-named federal agency at the Miami Airport (HINT...my job was to look through your stuff for nail clippers and other bad things). Anyway, the workforce was very mixed!

One dude was named Raquel. I swear I am not making any of this up. The dude insisted that he was in fact a she. His offical government issued name tag even said Raquel. We all called Raquel a "shim".

when I first had to work with shim, I thought "crap that is a fat ugly dude!". Then I noticed the name tag. So I was a bit confused. Can a woman be THAT ugly? Is it possible? Then shim said something to me. It's voice was like Arnold "The Govenerator"s voice - deep. VERY deep. About 3 octaves deeper than my voice. So at that point I had to bite my cheek till it was bleeding to not bust out laughing. I did not want to get fired for "insensitivity". The government is big into that kind of crap.

Anyway, shim would seriously confuse passengers. People would ask shim questions by saying things like "excuse me sir, where is gate 5?" and Raquel would say (in a voice that sounds like Conan The Barbarian) "I am a mam, not a sir. See my name tag? It says Raquel". I SWEAR it would say that all the time. I am a mam, not a sir. It always cracked me up.

Anyway, the poor passenger would always get a confused look on his or her face, like they were expecting someone to jump out of the x-ray machine and say "SMILE! You are on candied camera!". They would not know what to say. After a pause to see exactly what the person was going to do, one of the normal people who worked with me would step in to rescue the poor person.

Sometimes the passenger would flat bust out laughing, and then Raquel would get upset. Other times, the passenger would say something funny or rude right back to shim. These people always made the work day funnier. Either way, one of the normal people would have to step in.

Shim also had a SERIOUS attitude. It would be the first to cry harassment, and it was no secret that shim had a cheeseball lawyer just itching to sue the federal government for some bullshit. So we all had to be very careful what we said to shim, and under no circumstances could we make any jokes at all around it. It was pain in the ass.

Shim would also skip out on some of the things that we had to do, but nobody liked to do. This is HAND WANDING! Everyone hates this. The agency has a very strict policy about using the hand held metal detector, and that is men wand men, women wand women. This policy is set firmly in stone.

So who did shim wand? NOBODY! Technicaly, it was a female. But in reality it was a dude. So according to policy it could not wand men because it was (on paper) a woman. But it still had a goober, so it was a man and could not wand women. It was always a pain in the ass for the others who had to work in the same land as shim.

Then there was the time that shim used the WOMEN'S bathroom at the airport, IN UNIFORM. Of course, the other women bolted and told the cops that a pervert wearing the same uniform as me (and everyone else) was in the ladies room, standing up to pee. So the cops went in and found Raquel. They brought Raquel back to the checkpoint to report shim to the supervisor before arresting it. Well, shim protested that it was in fact a woman. The cops were not buying it. They did not have to be nice to shim like we did. The supervisor explained the situation to the cops. In the end the cops let shim go, but I did hear the cop tell it "next time I find you in the ladies room with a penis I will arrest your ass". Well after that shim was moved to a checkpoint that was near a unisex (handicap) restroom. These bathrooms have a locking door and only accomodate one person at a time.

Then there was the time that shim wore a yamaka for the high holy days. Of course, in the jewish religion ONLY men wear the yamaka, although in some of the less orthodox temples women can wear them too. Yes, shim was jewish. Anyway, wearing the yamaka would only cause more people to assume it was a man - and this resulted in more "I am a mam not a sir" speeches. It was funny, but would get annoying after the 25th time in one day. So I finally just told it to either take the hat off, OR just put up with people calling it sir. Shim pointed out the name badge, and I reminded it about its deep voice, facial hair, lack of boobs (it did have fat guy man boobs), and hat. What else were people supposed to think?

Anyway, shim was transfered to baggage (along with me, I could not get away from it no matter HOW much I told the manager that I was going to kick its ass one day). One slow day, shim fell asleep at the big x-ray machine. It got written up, and was sent home for a week without pay (the agency was terrified of the lawyer). Then a week after that, shim fell asleep again and was FINALLY fired. Shim could not cry harassment, because there was documentation backing up the action.

Everyone was happy

So there you all go. Now you all have the inside story of a Miami TSA legend, the story of Raquel.
Just try to picture, if you can, Conan The Barbarian saying "I am a mam, not a sir" while wearing a Yamaka and a name badge that said "Connie The Barbarian". Now try to think about that and NOT LAUGH.Even to this day, it cracks me up.

Thanks to my readers

Not only did the hit counter roll over 1000, it busted it. Right now the counter is showinf 1037 hits. This is amazing! According to Stat Counter, the page was loaded 70 times, with 46 unique visitors!
I have a blocking cookie on my computer, so I do not count as a visitor, and I do not think my page loads are counted either!

Anyway - thank you to everyone who has helped make me feel like people are actually reading the stuff I post. The fact that people read this keeps me motivated to post daily.

And to those who leave comments, I want you to know that I read every single comment. I have even left postings responding to some comments!

My blog would not be the same without the people who read it and leave comments. I would have probably lost interest in this by now if not for the comments.

Real men use plastic poofy things on a string

Thats right - I said it. Real men use plastic poofy things on a string, along with that sented liquid soap in the shower.

I secretly made the switch some time ago, and I love it. No more nasty wet washcloth hanging on a rack. Do you realize how much bactria can fester in a wet rag? If you do not, then you are lucky. You will never know. but those of us who know bacteria know that a wet rag in hanging on a shower rack is a scary thing to touch.

The plastic poofy thing (I think it is called a loofah??) is way better than a nasty old wet rag. It is plastic, and it will not really hold water. It is attached to a string, so you can hang it somewhere when you are done with it. It can be rinsed clean and dries very quickly. Bacteria do not like dry places as much as they like wet places, so the plastic poofy thing breeds less critters than the old wet rag. It is very mildly abrasive, so it scrubs the grime and dead skin cells away. The old rag has to depend on the soap to do all the work. It actually feels better to use the plastic thing than the old nasty bacteria-infested wet rag.

I have also been secretly using that liquid bath soap for men stuff. So far I think I like the Red Zone line the best. They have cool nautical sounding scents like "Aqua Reef" and "Glacial Falls". I was using some other brand, but then the Red Zone commercials started to air and I switched. I am weak I guess. So much for brand loyality!

And yes, I do think that the squeaky -clean shower smell DOES last longer than with bar soap.

The liquid soap is also better than the old bar soap. It suds up a lot better for one. I think that they put some stuff in it to soften the water, which is great because here in South Florida the tap water is as hard as the rocks it comes out of. The bar soap gets soft and squishy if it is left in standing water, the liquid soap is in a plastic bottle. Bar soap gets gross hairs stuck in it, the liquid stuff never does. And the liquid soap feels better on the skin than the bar stuff.

Teamed up with the plastic poofy thing, the liquid soap is clearly better than the bar soap and the old wash rag. It makes the shower experience so much better. Real men know this, and have kicked bar soap and nasty wet rags to the curb.

By the way, this has NOTHING to do with The Little Bar Of Soap's blog. This is just about how liquid scented soap for men teamed up with foo-foo looking plastic puffy wash-things ARE better than the old school stuff.

Who will it be?

Attention reader! Take the time to tab this page down till you see my hit counter. If you see the number 1.000 - you are the 1,000th hit since I installed the counter! Hooray for you!

You win a beverage of your choice. And you have to buy it. Not much of a prize, but it is the best I can do.

If you are number 1,000 - leave a comment to bask in the glory of the free drink you have to buy.

Math

In another blog, someone wrote about the economics of the war. without getting into the politics of the whole thing, I will just stick to the math and economic theory.

first off, a war CAN boost the economy. It happened twice. After WWI, we had the roaring 20s. Then a massive crash in the 30s, only to be pulled out of it by massive public works projects and a build up for WWII. And during WWII, the USA went into production overtime. So many war materials were cranked out that nothing can be compared to it today. Shipyards were putting out entire Liberty Ships DAILY. Facotries were running 24/7. Steel was being produced as fast as it could be used.

After WWII, all these factories had the capital to re-tool, so when people came home there were plenty of factory jobs. And with all the jobs, people had money. And with money, people bought a lot of stuff made in American facotries. The system was in awesome shape.

But what about Vietnam? From an economic standpoint, it was a stupid thing to do. We were at full employment and full production. The job market did not need a war to create more jobs. Factories were perfectly happy making electric can openers and consumer vehicles. There were not many factories with unused capacity that could be used to make tanks.

So, the government had to compete with consumers for things like steel and aluminum. This caused the price of everything to go up. Fuel costs went up. Car prices went up. Electric can openers cost more. Everything cost more.

And things were more expensive for the military too. They had to compete with consumers for the same resources. So their tanks, guns, and bullets cost more.

So you are a factory manager. Your factory is doing just fine making electric motors for washing machines. Along comes Uncle Sam and he says "retool your plant to make tank parts". What do you say? Chances are you would say "I would rather not, unless you can make it worth my while". The plant would have to shut down to re-tool, re-train the entire workforce, and it would be months before the first tank part came off the line. Time is money, so that first tank part would cost A LOT. The government had to pay for the re-tooling, the re-training, AND the downtime that oculd have been used making washing machine motors. during WWII, there was no downtime to pay for because that factory was empty to begin with.

So now there is another war going on. As far as the economy is concerned, things look more like Vietnam than WWII. Yea, there was an economic downturn in 2000. And yes, Septmber 11 added to that slowdown. But in no way was the slowdown like the 1930s. The unemployment rate was not that high, inflation was rather low, and capital was cheap due to low interest rates. All in all, not a bad economic outlook.

So, according to economcs it was not a good time to start a war. I am ignoring the political implications of the war, I am trying to just stick to economics here.

Oh yea, I almost forgot to add in this little fact. American production has been outsourced. So even if the government starts to order tank parts, there is no gurantee that the parts will not be made in Mexico.

I would really like for Econo-Girl to chime in here. She can probably add to this posting. Hell, I might even be wrong here. I really do not know too much advanced economic theory to consider myself any kind of "expert".

Skywarn

There was at least one question about one of my serious stickers. All my
stickers ARE serious, I selected them for a reason.

I am talking about my Skywarn sticker. Skywarn is a real program sponsored by the National Weather Service. The NWS does a pretty good job, and they have access to all sorts of high tech gizmos -but gizmos are not always enough. They still need human spotters.

This is where Skywarn comes into play. It would cost a left testicle to hire
enough NWS staff to cover all the spotting needs. So, the NWS uses volunteers.
Skywarn spotters are NOT those crazy people that try to get as close to tornados
as possible, all they do is report what they happen to see. The professional
storm chasers are scientists, the amateur chasers are adrenaline junkies.
Skywarn spotters are just regular people with cell phones that have the bat line
to the local NWS office in case they see something.

The NWS provides a training class to all volunteers, where they teach you
what to look for. The class takes one day, and it is very interesting. You learn
what to look for in clouds that might warn of a tornado getting ready to spawn.
You can then call the NWS office, and they will watch the doppler radar where
you are. They might even issue a warning, because you called in. That warning
might give someone enough time to get into a safe place before the twister hits.

Many Skywarn spotters are ham radio operators, but it is NOT required. You
can phone in your reports. If you want to learn more about Skywarn in your area,
contact the local office of the National Weather Service nearest to you.

Homeless Stickers

As you all can see in the previous post, there is not a whole lot of open
space left on my truck rear window. I can actually see out of the back window,
there is a gap under the "What Would Scooby Do" sticker and over the "Think Its
Patriotic" and "W with circle and slash" stickers. This allows me to see what is
directly behind me. Also I have large side mirrors, for towing. I do not run
into very many things. Except for that one time when......well never mind. The
police do not know about that incident, and that is the way I want it to stay.

But there are more stickers I have that are homeless. There is no real estate left on the rear window. I could put them on the bumper, but they might not be as noticed. Anyway, for your viewing pleasure here are the homeless stickers. The white sticker is not going on my vehicle, they are designed to go on pissers in the men's room. I have a dozen of the white stickers.

The full size photo is HERE. The red and blue sticker came from
www.evolvefish.com and the white sticker
came from www.democracymeansyou.com

My sticker collection

These are the stickers I put on my truck. I have been collecting these stickers since the truch was new (November 2001). The first stickers were the pelican Everglades National Park sticker and the small flag. Then I expanded.

The Remedy Session is a local band that I saw one night. I was drinking beer, and the band had a really hot chick playing the bass guitar. So, I took a sticker.

Skywarn is a program sponsored by the National Weather Service. I am a part time weather spotter. I do not get paid.

ARRL is the American Radio Relay League. I am a ham radio operator, and the ARRL is the national lobby for ham radio.

FPL is Florida Power And Light. My dad works for them. The rest of the stickers are either pro-union OR anti-shrub. The think flag is netural. Click HERE for a full size photo (600k).


My sticker collection. I drove the truck into Georgia with these stickers.

Interview With An Iguana

Thanks to dddragon for these interview questions. If you want some of your
own, just go to her blog and ask for them. Go to my links section and click
"Is Anything Truly Random". Or click it right here. Whatever floats your boat.

1. A TV Show is cast about your life. List five characters and who would
play them.

First of all, it would be a dull show. But I suppose that I could be played by the guy who is Eric on That 70s Show. My good friend of 15 years could be played by the guy who is Hyde on That 70s Show. I really do not know who could play the other people. I would have to watch more TV shows and think about it.

2. What are the worst books assigned for you to read in High School.

This is a much more easy question. Without a doubt, the single WORST BOOK I had to read (but never did even get a copy of) was The President's Lady. It was a fictional story of Andrew Jackson and his wife Rachel written from Rachel's point of view. It was supposed to be historical fiction, but the only history was that there actually was a guy named Andrew Jackson who was president. The rest was pure swill. The book was so bad, that the teacher cancelled the reading, and then she had us read Black Rain. I laughed at everyone who scoured bookstores (there was no Amazon.com in 1990) looking for that crappy book. I had decided to just take the F.

3. If money were no object and you could have 5 homes, where would they
be?

I suppose I would get one home right here in Miami - but on a waterway. The waterway would have to be deep enough for boat traffic, and connected directly to the bay. And there would have to be a boat lift on the seawall. I would also have a home in The Virgin Islands. Same deal, on a waterway. Home number three would be in Europe. Probably in Amsterdam, on a canal. Home four would be in Prague, Czech Republic. Preferably on a river. Or at least with a view of a river. Home 5 would be on The Black Sea in a costal town of Bulgaria. Why Bulgaria? I don't know. It would be close to my home in Prague. And I would cheat by having a 6th home, one with a twin hull, a 50 foot pole (at least), and some sails. It would be cool to cruise the Black Sea into Russia, or to sail through Asia Minor and into the Mediterranean.

4. What would be the one thing you would change about yourself, and what
would be the one thing that you would not change about yourself?

I would change my inability to put up with crap. I would not change to the point that I would put up with any crap, but I would like to be able to put up with just a little more crap than I can deal with now. It would lower stress level, and probably help me keep a job for longer. I would NOT change my ability to stick to what I think is the right thing to do. This sometimes gets me in trouble, like when the boss asks me what I think about operations and I tell him things he does not want to hear. But such is life.

5. A well-meaning relative sends you a fruit cake for the holidays. What
would you do with it?

I would re-gift it. I do not know anyone who eats that stuff. I have a theory that there are only a dozen or so fruit cakes on the planet, and that people simply circulate them around. Kind of like a chain letter, only they do not reproduce. So when I get them I send them off to someone else. I am careful not to return it to the sender. It is an inside joke with some people I know. They know I am re-gifting the thing, and they know that I know they will send it off to someone else.

Thanks for the questions dddragon!

New features

I have added some new features to my blog, to make things easy for my growing public.

First, please direct your attention to the and icons to your left. These icons link to alternate site feeds. Using a browser that you can DL for free, you can subscribe to this blog and read the posts without having to load the page. XML and RSS feeders deliver you just the posts, in a format similar to e-mail. You will still get pictures and links included in the posts.

The XML icon links to the site feed created by Blogger.com. It is a basic no-frills feed, but it does what it needs to. The RSS icon links to my site on feedburner.com. This feed is a little more snazzy, with links to RSS readers and such.

I tested the feeds, and I was able to subscribe to my own blog. They were not working before, but thanks to one alert reader who pointed out to me that something was wrong I was able to re-edit some HTML.

Song for Jevanking

You said that you are sick of hearing the same song at closing time. Well, here is another song you might like better.

WARNING - may contain some profanity. In good taste. Really.

How to damage your brain and liver at Disney World

Today I will discuss the fine art of drinking around the world. Now I know you are probably thinking that this can not be done, but I am here to tell you it can. And you might be thinking “Yea, you can drink around the world if you are Donald Trump and you have your own private leer jet”, but this is also incorrect. Anyone can do it, and it only takes one day.

At Epcot Center in Walt Disney World (in Orlando FL) there is something called the World Showcase. The showcase is made for adults, kids find it very boring. I used to think it was boring too, nothing to do but watch some crappy boring movies, walk into boring trinket shops, or sit through some horrible show.

But then I turned 21, and suddenly noticed that every country in the showcase serves alcohol. And not just beer! Most places have full bars. That’s right, anything you want is right there. The world showcase was instantly not boring anymore.

The goal of drinking around the world is to start off in either Mexico or Canada, have a drink in each country, and make your way around the entire showcase. The nations represented are (starting the way I always go when I am there) Canada, UK, France, Morocco, Japan, USA, Italy, Germany, China, Norway, and Mexico. That is 11 drinks.

Not all places have full bars, but most do. The places that lack full bars at least have wine and beer, imported from the nation represented. Canada for example has Molson. Morocco has a beer called Casablanca, imported from Morocco (it is really not that good).

So here is my story.

A few years ago I went to Disney with a friend of mine. She is a huge Disney freak, and is not opposed to drinking. So I figured it was going to be a good trip.

We started off in Canada. I am not really a big Molson fan, so we skipped Canada. It was only 10 AM and to get Canadian wine we would have had to go into the restaurant there (Le Cellier Steakhouse) which was not open yet. We did chuckle at The Royal Canadian Kilted Yacksmen (Ren And Stimpy joke), who were putting on a bagpipe music show.

The next stop was the UK. I love the UK, they have a “real” English Pub. It is called The Crown And Rose. And better yet, it opens up with the park! So here I was, at 10:15 AM, getting ready to order my first drink. I ordered an Irish Carbomb, and the bartender who was from London (for an added touch of realism, the people who work in the World Showcase are imported form the nations represented – in France your waiter is really French) looked at me funny and said “In the UK we just call those carbombs.” A carbomb is ½ pint of Guinness Stout (a kind of beer), and a shot of ½ Jameson Irish Whiskey and ½ Balies Irish Crème. I also ordered an extra shot of London Dry Gin to make up for the drink I skipped in Canada.

To drink a Carbomb, you have to take the shot glass and drop it into the ½ pint, then chug it. So I did. It was now 10:20 AM.

Next was France. Of course, I had to have wine! So I went to the wine booth and got some. The chick that was in the booth was quite cute, and informed me I was the first customer of the day. My reply was “somewhere on the planet it is 5 PM”. I was already feeling the effects.

Next stop was Morocco. I found a booth that was selling pastries and coffee to the WEAK who were there with kids doing the responsible parent thing, so of course I order a beer. The guy said they were not cold yet – and I said that was OK. Who needs chilled beer? 10:40 and I was already on drink 4 for the day. I was starting to feel it.

Japan was next. Japan happens to be my favorite nation at Epcot. I walked through the gift shop, bought a bottle of sake (Japanese rice wine) and a sake set and had it sent to my room. Then I walked through a really cool tin toys display, which featured all sorts of wind up mechanical toys made from tin in Japan. If you think Japanese cars are well made, you ought to see their hand crafted tin toys made by master metal smiths!

By this time I was hungry, so I went to the lounge area of the restaurant for some green tea, sushi, and of course hot sake. My friend had some plum wine, which I also tried. Plum wine is EXCELLENT, I like it better than grape wine. By now I was fairly loaded and people with kids were starting to give me dirty looks.

I skipped the USA. Frankly, this is the most boring of all the nations at Epcot. It is nothing but hot dogs, hamburgers, and Budweiser. I do not even know why the USA is there, it is just wasted space. I would rather see another FORIGEN nation there, like Russia or Poland.

Next was Italy. I had the “wine tour of Italy”, which included a tasting of 4 or 5 Italian wines from all over the country. Do not ask me what these wines tasted like, I cant remember. For all I know, they gave me tap water. I was bombed.

Next was Germany. I had the “wine tour of Germany” which was another tasting of 4 or 5 German wines. Once again, I was way too loaded to taste anything. I was far too wasted.

After that I gave up. I knew I was close to my goal, but it was over. First off, it was only 3 PM and I was swimming. I had more than one drink per nation. I was unable to walk in a straight line, I had to use my friend (who at this point was just as loaded as I was) for support. Actually, we used each other for support. I just could not have any more to drink. I had to pass China, Norway, and Mexico.

So close, yet so far.

People were giving the two of us REALLY dirty looks. Here we were, drunk as piss ants, in Disney World, all before noon (I was drunk before Japan, everything after that was a matter of how much over drunk I was). Of course I knew why they were flashing the looks. THEY wanted to be doing what we were doing, but they could not. They had to be responsible parents, we did not.

One day, I will attempt to drink around the world again. And the next time, I WILL make it.

Oh yea, after Epcot we stumbled to the Riverwalk area and continued to consume alcohol. At some point we got something for dinner, but I can not remember what. And to end the day, we got on the wrong bus. The bus driver was really cool, he would open the bus door without turning on the light, and he even made a special trip to the resort we were staying at.

I like Disney. They really take care of you. Even if you are drunker than a skunk.

Commercials of DOOM!!

So today I was watching TV, minding my own business – when suddenly I was assaulted by yet another commercial.

It was yet another drug commercial. I forgot what chemical the commercial was pushing, but it was one of these “you just can not live without this pill” deals.

This commercial was full of wonderful images. A bright sunny day, people engaged in activities that they could not take part in if not for the drug, and so forth.

But then came the end of the commercial. It sounded something like this:

(Announcer dude talking fast)
WonderDrug is not for everyone. May cause bleeding from the anus, growth of extra eyes, horrible hemorrhoids, loss of sexual drive due to your balls falling off, kidney damage, hair growth on your knuckles, and your liver to pass with your next bowel movement.

Discontinue taking WonderDrug if your hair turns lime green, you notice strange lumps on your ass, your arms turn purple, your blood start to boil, or your feet fall off. People who are pregnant, thinking of getting pregnant, or planning on knocking someone up should not use or even touch WonderDrug. Ask your doctor if WonderDrug is right for you, and if your doctor says no go to our web site for a list of doctors who will say yes.

Meanwhile, happy images continued to be shown. Even while the rather extensive list of possible side effects were very quickly announced.

I do not think that drug companies should be allowed to advertise their products. All it does is place pressure on doctors to prescribe the drug to people who walk into the office demanding it. Idiots diagnose themselves based on 30 second TV commercials, then decide that they MUST have the little purple pill. If their doctor disagrees, they shop around till they find a pill pusher who gets a kickback from the company for every script they write.

But of course the FCC is more concerned about Howard Stern, or someone saying a “bad word” on TV than the crap drug companies advertise. And the FDA is owned by the companies, so they will not say anything. And Congress…..they will do nothing. The drug companies own too many suit wearing weasels.

Meanwhile, why not consider asking your doctor if the little pill is right for you. Who cares if it causes anal leakage, or body parts to fall off? Pfizer needs to sell a zillion of those pills so that their earnings meet Wall Street expectations. We can not have top level managers not make their bonus!

And do not forget to click the cool blinking link above the blog title! Sign my "Clown Suits" petition!

Sign my petition!

Now that I have found a solution to my HTML idea, you will notice some blinking text above the blog title.

Click on that text. It is a link to my online petition. Feel free to send that link to anyone you might think would find humor in it.

Know Your Lizards

OK, there is some confusion in the identification of my two
pet lizards, Max and Spaz. Hopefully, this post will clear up the confusion.

Maximilion (Max) is a Savanna Monitor (Varanua exanthematicus) . He hails from the semi-arid regions (savannas) of Africa. They can be found in Central and Western Africa. They like open forests and rocky areas. They also like the climate to be hot and somewhat dry. Max is a ground lizard, but he can climb. In the wild baby monitors usually hang out in the trees, and adults hang out closer to the ground. They can get to be 5 feet long.

Savanna Monitors, like all monitor lizards, have a forked tongue like a snake. They use their forked tongue exactly like snakes do, to smell the ground and air by tasting it. They are rather agile lizards, capable of bursts of speed on land. Their tail has a ridge running down it, and in the water they use their tail to swim with. Being from a semi-arid region, savanna monitors are not true swimming lizards (like the nile monitor or the alligator), but they can swim if they want to. They have powerful jaws and small teeth. A few species of monitors eat fruit, but most are carnivores. Max eats fried eggs, mice, and boiled chicken guts. Wild savanna monitors eat mostly snails, frogs, other lizards, bird eggs, and whatever else they can find.

Unlike other lizards, monitor lizards do not drop their tails. Once a monitor looses its tail, it does not grow back. This is what a Savanna Monitor looks like. This is not Max, this lizard is a little too fat. Max is not overfed. This one is.

Spaz is a Green Iguana (Iguana iguana). He hails from the rain forests of Central and South America. Spaz likes the climate to be hot and wet. He is probably happier in his outside cage than Max is. Green Iguanas can be found anywhere in Central and South America that has a jungle.

Iguanas are tree lizards, more comfortable off the ground than on the ground. They are also excellent swimmers, which is good because there is water everywhere in the rain forest. They escape from enemies by either climbing or dropping from trees into water then swimming away. They can also whip you with their tail (it hurts) or bite you (that hurts more).

Iguana tongues are not forked. They are rounded (like the tongues of most lizards) but unlike insect eating lizards iguanas can not extend their tongues very far. They do not have to, as iguanas eat fruit and other vegetative growth. Any insects they do eat are on or in the fruit they eat. Like monitor lizards, they do taste things to smell them.

Baby iguanas are bright green, but as they get older they loose their bright color. Adult green iguanas can range from a dull green to a dull yellow. Adult male iguanas have large spines along their back, but these spines are not sharp. They are flexible and useless for defense. Females have back spikes too, but they are much smaller.

It is common to see wild green iguanas in South Florida. These non-native lizards are the result of pets that either escape or are let loose. The climate in South FL is similar enough to a rain forest that the iguanas are happy here. It does get colder in the winter than it does in a real rain forest, but not cold enough to kill off the wild iguanas. They live and breed just like they could in Costa Rica.

It is less common to see wild monitor lizards in South Florida. I would think that there is a colony of them somewhere, but I have not seen any. Savanna Monitors would do just fine in South Florida, even if it is a bit wetter than it is in the plains of Africa. Nile Monitors (also from Africa)
would do very well in South Florida, they like to swim. The many canals here would suit them just fine.

For my mext lizard pet, I want either a Chinese Water Dragon (kind of looks like an iguana, but not really ) or a Tegu (South-American ground lizard with a forked tongue and snake-like skin).

These are the top 10 things people say that make me want to STRANGLE them.

10. Add it up
9. Dawg
8. Word
7. Word up dawg
8. Homie
7. Do the math
6. Wat, Wat up, etc
5. Dude
4. Like
3. Peace, Peace out, etc
2. That’s Straight
1. Cool Beans

And now, another Sanibel photo! This should make up for the dumbass in the previous picture (see the post right after this one).

The time share in Sanibel has one very strict rule – NO PETS! I understand why, people would bring dogs that would poop all over the beach. Pets would mess in the apartments, causing stains and odors. Cats might damage the furniture, or pee on the towels. Also, one of the other owners of the apartment might be allergic to your pets.

So, no pets at Sanibel. So, what happens is the cats and dogs go to the vet for a week. I pawn Goober the bird off on one of my friends (Goober is not my pet, nor are the dogs). But this leaves one (now two) other pets.

Max the Savanna Monitor, and now Spaz the Iguana. Nobody really boards lizards. The vet probably would, but really they are not set up for it. The cages are not really large enough.

So last year I smuggled in Max. I did not have Spaz at the time. Max lived on the porch for the week, and nobody ever found out. He almost got busted once when he decided to climb the screen (Max is three feet from head to tail). He liked his vacation, that porch is much larger than his cage. And just a little more than a month later, Hurricane Charlie came – removing all evidence that might have been left.

Don’t tell the leasing office. I will probably have to do the same thing again this year. I still do not know what I will do with Spaz. I might have to haul his cage to a friend’s house and leave him there. Max is so much tamer than Spaz is.

No pets - but who would call a three foot lizard a pet?

Photo for Indeterminacy

I forgot where I found this photo, but it is funny.

The challenge will be to come up with a story that contains a reason WHY this idiot decided to do this in the first place. Even the president would have known better.

Click here for the full size image.

What a moron.

The Airport

I called the airport today because they did not call me. At the interview they said they would know something by Tuesday.

Well, that has been bumped back to the end of the week. I assume this means Friday. So.....the suspense continues!

When the trials over, watch out for freaks.

I was going to write about the Michael Jackson verdict, but then I decided not to. There is really nothing left to say. But here is a summary

1. He was found not guilty on all counts
2. This does not mean he is not guilty, it is just what the jury decided
3. His supporters are ALL FREAKS.

One supporter lady released a white dove for each not guilty count. Which makes me wonder what she would have done if he had been found guilty. I am speculating that she would have gone all Ozzy and bit the dove’s head off. Then she would have said “I am Iron Fan” and started to play the air guitar.

There was another fan on TV, a grown ass man, CRYING about the whole thing. Dude was wearing no shirt and had what looked to be a license plate hanging around his neck. I do not even know where to start with this one. Grown men crying while not wearing a shirt and sporting fashionable license plates around their neck need to be watched by Homeland Security. In Florida, his ass would have been BAKER ACTED! Under the Baker Act, police in FL can declare you to be crazy, take you into custody, and deliver you to a funny farm for an evaluation – all involuntary.

But anyway the freak show is over. Finally. All the freaks can now go home. Or back to the funny farm, or the rock they crawled out from under. As long as they go I do not care where.

OOPS! I said I was not going to talk about this! So I will stop now, and never say another word. At least not till the next trial.

So, back to Sanibel!

In this photo you can see the screen porch area of the condo from ground level. This is what I see when I walk back from the beach. And in a little over 1 month, I will be there!

There will be much Sierra Nevada Pale Ale consuming mayhem occurring on this porch. Soon. Very soon. I am counting the days.

For the full size photo, use this link.

Here it is.

More Sanibel Photos

Today I do not feel like ranting. Or raving. Or even thinking. So this can mean only one thing!

MORE SANIBEL PHOTOS!!!

To answer a few questions, I do not live here. I just get to use the place once a year for a week.

When I was 4 or 5, my parents fell for a "free vacation" offer. All they had to do was listen to a sales pitch. Well, it must have been one hell of a pitch because my dad bought it. So, for the past 25 or 26 years I have gone to the same apartment on Sanibel Island during the third week of July.

I once calculated the internal rate of return on the investment, based on the inital payment and 25 years of maintence fees VS the cost of just renting a week every year from the resort office (the current posted rate in the room is $1500 - $2500 per week, depending on the time of year. Winter cost more, our week goes for about $1800). But the calculation left out one thing that is impossible to figure in - the value of the vacation itself. So what did we learn? The IRR function is not the end all it is billed as being.

The timeshare is not really mine per say, my dad does actually own it and pay the maintence fees. But if they are not there, it becomes my private crash pad. And if they are there - it is still a nice pad to hang out at.

Just look at the view from the screen porch! Much beer has been consumed on this porch.


My Porch

Bad Laws

I want to start today’s post off with this GREAT ARTICLE! The article was sent to me by The Wizard Of Odds, a math geek who runs a gambling odds website. He is a consultant for the gaming industry, and has the best odds site I have been able to find.

Anyway, apparently he used to work for the Social Security Administration – as a math geek. The article is kind of long, but it is excellent. It tells you what the situation is with Social Security, WITHOUT a political bias or spin. The article is all about the math – and math has no political party. 2 plus 2 equals 4 no matter who the president is.

Now on to stuff I am going to write about. Many other blogs have discussed the Patriot Act, and what it means. Here is what I think.

I think that making laws as powerful as the Patriot Act is because of fear is a bad idea. I like some of the things in the act, such as inter-agency cooperation. Frankly, I was alarmed to find out that federal agencies did not share information. But there are other provisions of the law that have no place in America.

Groups like the ACLU have attacked the act so viscously because it contains some very scary things. Republicans have fought right back, saying things like “The ACLU is soft on terrorism”. Fear tactic. Plain and simple. They are taking advantage of the fact that people are afraid to deflect the issues.

Another thing that bothers me is the name chosen for the law. Who named it The Patriot Act? People in congress who wanted to pushed through at all costs. They picked a cool sounding name at a time when Americans were firmly behind the President to do something about September 11. Everyone had car flags, and flag pins. Then came the Patriot Act. Who would oppose the law? UN-patriotic people, that’s who! People who support Osama! People who hate America! Like so many blind sheep, politicians lined up to cast a very patriotic vote.

The law allows the government to urinate on several key parts of the Bill Of Rights, in the name of “fighting terror”. One part that can be urinated on is the right to have access to an attorney. If a person is held under the Patriot Act, they do not have to be given access to anything. They can be held in secret (so as to not allow other “terrorists” to know they have been arrested) and for an indefinite amount of time. The person does not even have to be told why they are being held. And of course, the government can withhold “classified” information from the defense. And a jury can not be allowed access to “classified” information, so the trial can be held by a military tribunal, in secret, without being able to prepare a defense.

Some would say that all this does not matter, because nobody is being snatched off the street. I say that nobody is being snatched off the street YET – at least not that we know of. And if they were, we would not know because it would be a secret. And what happens when the Justice Department decides that opposing the President is a potential “terrorist” act? Maybe this will not happen today, but it could happen in 20 years.

Lets not forget that ALL oppressive regimes start off with little steps. When Hitler was elected to power in Germany, the first thing he did was chip away at EVERYONE else’s power. At some point he outlawed all other political parties. He set up the SS, and used the secret police to terrorize anyone who disagreed with him. All this was done in little steps, and ALL “for the good of the German People”. The lesson? Beware of politicians that chip away at your rights, or try to consolidate government power under one party. Even the smallest step in this direction should be opposed by the people at any and all costs.

So should we allow the government to have the power to have secret police, secret jails, and secret courts? Should we allow the government to arrest people without having to provide and proof or demonstrate any reasonable cause? Should we allow the government to have the power to make parts of the Bill Of Rights optional? Are we 100% sure that these powers will NOT be abused in the future?

I say no. These powers have no place in a free society. Keep the good parts of the bill, and toss out the rest. Or better yet, let the whole thing die and start over from scratch. Without the secret jails and secret courts.

Good times, bad times....I know I have had my share.

I have a few things to rant about today.

First of all, the stupid tropical storm did not get close enough. People still brought their kids to the learning center. So I had to do something at work today. There was one good thing however. There were no 2:00 kids, so I got to sit around for an hour and a half. I still got paid of course. So it was not a total loss.

But it was OK. I kind of like the job. Yea, I would like to be paid more, but everyone wants to be paid more. The boss does not piss me off, and the kids are OK. So the job is cool. Even if I do have to work sometimes.

But this is way more annoying. Last night while blogging my laptop suddenly went into battery mode. No big deal right? The problem is that it was plugged into the wall at the time. For some reason the AC power supply had quit working. But I have a Centrino processor and a long life lithium ion battery so it was ok. I finished what I was doing then shut the computer down.

The power supply seemed to be dead. I tested the output voltage using a multi-meter. It is supposed to put out 15 volts, I was getting either zero or .02 volts. THIS was a problem. No power supply means no way to charge the battery. And new power supplies are expensive. I was seriously bummed.

But as you already know, 2:00 there were no students at the learning center. So I had from 2:00 – 3:30 free. I went to Best Buy to get another power supply. $90 later I had a crappy ass aftermarket universal power supply. And this power supply does not run on 120v, it runs on 12v. It was made for use in an airplane or car. So I would need to use a 12v power supply I have for 2 way radios AND the crappy $90 computer power supply. Wires wires everywhere!

But when I got home from work, I tested the 120v supply again. It worked! It would not work the night before, but here it was putting out 15 volts.

So now I have to go back to Best Buy and return the crappy ass aftermarket power supply. I will get my $90 back, but I have to go back to Best Buy. I am weak; I will probably end up buying something else. In fact I know I will. I will but the Stripes DVD with 20 minutes of never before seen footage.

And now I leave you…..ANOTHER SANIBEL ISLAND PHOTO! In this photo you can see the resort swimming pool. You can see the pool bar in the background. It is the shack with COCONUTS painted on the roof. As always, click HERE for a full size photo.

the pool

Stupid people part 2

AHHH! The sky is falling!

Wait a minute. No it's not! Friday it will rain a little, and the wind will blow. OHHHHHHH....SCARY! It might also rain a little bit on Saturday. But by late Saturday afternoon and evening it will start to clear. The marine forecast for Sunday is 1-2 foot seas inside the reef, 2-3 feet seas outside the reef. For those of you without a boat, this is not crap. 2 foot seas in glass calm. It will be flatter than a stripper before her bob job.

But never mind these facts. People are stupid. I went to the store yesterday to get some boxed macaroni and cheese dinners. I live off these things. All single guys live off these things. It is a law. You only need one pot, which you can eat out of when you are done. And you only need some milk, half a stick of butter, the box of macaroni, and the powder cheese packet - and POOF! Instant dinner. And later there is only one pot and a fork to clean. Whoever invented these things must have been a single dude. He is my hero.

Anyway, the store was out of them. All they had were those crappy ass microwave boxed dinners. Someone had ravaged the isle. Either a bus load of dudes came by, OR people are freaking out about Arlene. Yes, there is some kind of tropical storm out there.

A flock of stupid people had to have ravaged the isle. AGHHHH! A tropical storm! It is going to rain and the wind will blow!! AGGGGHHHHH!

Luckily, I did find some boxed dinners in the back of the isle. So I was able to eat something.

There was plenty of beer. So I bought some of that. I also bought some more iguana food. He was out of bananas. And yellow squash.

People here are pansies. I went through Tropical Storm Bob while staying on Sanibel Island. Now, being on an island, and due to the fact that Bob pretty much made landfall on Sanibel, it was exciting. There was water across the entire island. I lived.

I am a real Floridian. All these other people are pansies.

But there is some good in all this. I will go to work today. I dont care if it is raining. I will be there! But if the customers keep their kids at home because of the big scary rain storm, I will not have to deal with them! HOORAY! I still get paid, but I do not have to work! WOO HOO!

On the other hand, the parents might get sick of having their kids at home. The rain will keep them inside. The parents might bring their kids to the learning center just to get rid of them for an hour or two. BOO BOOO BOOO!

And do not forget to read the prevoius post, titled "New Job?" :)

New Job?

Today, out of the clear blue sky, a job called.

I did not have to be at my current job till 4:30 PM, so I was just kind of lounging in bed, thinking about getting up. It was noon. But I did not have to pee, so I was not going to get up. The remote control was in easy reach. Life was good.

Anyway, my cell phone rings. I do not know the number - so I know it is not a friend. I figure it is just a wrong number.

But it was not a wrong number. It was operations at Miami International Airport. I agreed to go to an interview at 2 PM. Then I had to get up, shower, pee, brush my teeth, find good clothes, locate a tie (100% silk by the way) find my good shoes, and all that stuff.

But all the effort was worth it! As it turns out, they are looking for someone to meet important people as they de-plane and walk them through the whole Customs/Immigration process. What kind of important people? Diplomats, Presidents, Kings, and other assorted heads of state. WOW! I thought that this would be pretty cool! What a good break for me!

They are also looking for trainers. I happen to work for a very well known tutoring company, and I have worked for Dade County Public Schools teaching middle school science. Can I give training seminars? You bet! Can I speak in front of a room full of people? Not a problem! I am actually very good at running my mouth.

The only problem is that they would like someone who can speak spanish. I can not do this. But there are more languages on the planet than spanish and english - so I do not think that this will be a huge problem. What if the important person is a diplomat from Iceland? Does anyone working at the airport speak Icelandic? Probably not.

Also, educated people from the rest of the world (NOT America) can by and large speak at least 2 languages - their native language and english. So I think that I could do the job.

I think I did well in the interview. They are only going to interview 4 or 5 people including me. They need someone to start next week. Unless all the other people called have part time jobs or jobs they are willing to ditch with no notice, I might be the only choice.

I will know by Tuesday if I am selected. I would like to get the job. Dade County is a good employer, and the airport is a kinda cool place to work.

Previous post.

Read the comments.

How much more must we all endure?

How can people be so incredibly stupid?

[article found on the internet]

“Hundred of fans, reporters, photographers and TV crews gathered yesterday in front of the courthouse. The fans were holding signs saying such things as "Only love. No crime. He's innocent. Leave him alone," "We shall overcome" and "Peter Pan rules." A woman held a sign showing Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King Jr., and Jackson.”

[end of article]

[START OF RANT!!!!!!]

Hundreds of fans? Don’t those people have jobs? Who the hell wants to spend their day off hanging out in front of a court house? So, those fans must not have a job. Or a life.

And what about those signs? “We shall overcome” was a civil rights slogan. It does NOT apply to Jackson. What exactly did MJ have to overcome? Fame and fortune? More money than the Queen Of England? And what did the sign holder mean by “we” anyway? What did the person overcome with MJ? Maybe the sign holder is also a child molester. Or a grown man who sleeps with kids who are not his. Or whatever.

I think that whoever had the sign with Gandhi, Mandela, Dr. King, and MJ is the biggest moron of them all. How does MJ compare to Gandhi? Or to Dr. King? I wonder if the supreme moron even knows who those other men were, or what they did. Thriller was a good album in 1984, but I do not think it can compare to standing up to the British Empire using non-violence AND winning, going to jail to end apartheid, or giving up your life for the civil rights movement.

I hope the jury makes a decision very soon, so the idiots will go home. And if they do not take their stupid signs with them, I hope that the city fines them for littering.

I think that the jury will be hung. As I write this, day 2 of deliberations ended with no verdict. This can only mean that not everyone agrees. At this point, whoever thinks that MJ is guilty or not guilty is not going to change their mind. As long as the jurors with the minority opinion do not cave in just to go home, there will be no verdict. And with a hung jury that means…..Jackson Trial Part Two! God help us all. I do not think I can take much more. The stupid people with their stupid signs will send me over the edge.

Must….suppress….urge…..to…..strangle….idiots….using…..piano…..wire!!!!!!

Dr Strange Glove.

The truth about Miami

This is for my blog readers that do not live in Miami. You might think that this rat hole is a nice place to live. You might think that it is “paradise”. You might even think that you want to take a vacation here.

But you are WRONG! Miami FloriDUH is a festering hell hole, a cesspool of humanity. The Devil, one of my readers now, would love it here. So many souls free for the taking.

One problem is that nobody gives a crap about anybody else. Drivers are in their own little world, totally oblivious to anyone else on the road. Too many people think that traffic rules, like for example RED LIGHT MEANS STOP, do not apply to them. When lights cycle, at least three cars coast through the intersection. Sometimes more.

It is dangerous to be a pedestrian in Miami. People in cars WILL run your ass over. When Miami drivers see someone trying to walk across the street, do they slow down? NO. They either speed up or continue at the same speed like they do not see anything. People on foot know to run or die. Somehow, very few people get turned into road pizza. Probably because nobody walks anywhere.

Drivers also love to use the horn. They will sit there at a red light (when they actually decide to stop) with their hand on the horn. The millisecond that light is green, if you are not flooring it they honk. People also use the car horn as a doorbell. They will pull up in front of a house, and use the horn as opposed to getting out of the car and using the doorbell.

And there is also a trend to race from light to light. People here are either flooring the gas pedal or the brake pedal. Green light = STOMP ON IT!. Red light = slam on the brakes, and skid to a stop. Yellow lights mean "now is a good time to pick up the cell phone and start to dial someone up". It is like you can get a drivers license from a box of Cracker Jacks.

People will also think nothing of trashing the place up. The only reason the city is not drowning in a sea of litter is that the frequent rain carries it all into the storm sewers. I have seen, with my own eyes, people using the beach like a giant personal ash tray (putting the cigarette out in the beach sand, then leaving the butt sticking up and walking off). What disgusting, inconsiderate, filthy PIGS! What is even worse (but less common) is people leaving poopy baby diapers on the beach, buried under a few inches of sand. FIND A GARBAGE CAN! Or better yet, pick up a plastic bag someone else tossed on the ground and put the diaper in that - tie a knot - then throw it in the trash. Or even better, DO NOT HAVE KIDS! The last thing this planet needs are disgusting pigs breeding, and creating another generation who think that the beach is their personal landfill. If you can not be responsible for your trash, how can you be responsible for molding the young mind of another human being? If you feel that you just can not be bothered to use the trash can, do the world a favor and DROWN YOURSELF! It is easy to do that at the beach. I promise to not try to rescue you. At least then your dead body can be useful for something, like crab food.

There is also a large number of people here who care more about one Caribbean Island than they do about the USA. At least it seems that way some of the time.

It is common for neighbors to never speak to each other. In fact, most people HATE their neighbors. Why? Because if you live here chances are your neighbor is an asshole. They will have little or no regard for you. They will bitch about everything you do, but when they want to have a party they will direct guests to park in your yard, and play loud music all night. And don’t you dare complain! Oh no! THEY can do whatever they want, but you can not.

But really, this is not a huge shock. The island a lot of people here are obsessed with was run the exact way. There were the privileged, and the peons. The peons revolted. So the privileged came here and installed a similar system.

But as much as this place blows, I am stuck here. Like a rat on a boat at sea. I am too poor to just pack up and split. I do not have enough buffer money to rent a place to live while I look for work.

What Miami needs is a PEOPLE TRANSPLANT. It would be so nice to kick out about 90% of the population, and replace them with REAL PEOPLE. And I do not mean “people that speak English” or anything, I mean real people. People that are considerate. People that know the rules apply to them as well as to other people. People that do not act like their shit does not stink. You know, real people. Ordinary, polite, respectful people. I could care less what their national origin was. In fact, I would prefer a diverse population. Sameness is boring. As long as that diverse population was not rude and obnoxious.

But this is like expecting a tropical rain forest in Antarctica.It just isn’t going to happen. Too bad, because Miami could be paradise.

South Beach in the foreground, port Of Miami in the middle, and Downtown Miami in the background. I took this photo from a Cessna 172 flown by a friend of mine. It was a rental plane. Click HERE for a full size photo.

Sanibel Island

It looks like I will be able to go to Sanibel Island this year.

In case you do not know, last year hurricane Charlie hit Punta Gorda / Port Charlotte FL. Sanibel Island was also in the path of some pretty bad stuff. The time share had major roof damage, and everything in the apartment was soaked. Then the mold set in.

Anyway, all that will be fixed. The unit is not open yet, but they say it will be open very soon. So I will be able to go! That is, unless the mold comes back. That stuff is hard to get rid of.

I took the picture below one morning before I went fishing. In the background you can see San Carlos Bay. It is a protected waterway, as can be seen from the calm sea. I was facing to the north. That is not my sailboat, but it is close to what I would like to get one day. My boat is an 18 foot powerboat(here is another view from the roof) . That sailboat is about 25 - 28 feet. It would make a really nice weekend cruiser. You could even live on it, but if I were going to do that I would want something a little larger.

Click HERE for the full size photo. It is about 500k. I will share more of my Sanibel Island photos over the next few weeks. When I go there in July, I will have a Sanibel picture of the day. The resort has some sort of high speed internet access in the apartments.

I really like my week on the island. It is only 170 miles from my front door to the resort parking lot. I have been going almost every year for at least 25 years now.


This is not my boat :(

Being Green

Today’s lesson comes from my iguana. His name is Greenie. Yea, I know – not very creative.

Anyway, Kermit The Frog once said “It is not easy being green”. In fact, he made a song about it. Greenie The Iguana disagrees. And Kermit is not the only one with a song! Click on this line to hear a song by The Dead Milkmen about Greenie. The file is about 2 megs.

It IS easy being green. Every day, some idiot brings Greenie assorted fresh fruits and vegetables. The iguana gets things like fresh mango, bananas, grapes (red AND white seedless), yellow squash, zucchini, carrots, hibiscus flowers, apples, pears, and even strawberries. The food offerings are sprinkled with special lizard dietary supplement powder, packed with extra vitamins and calcium. The idiot even buys the lizard organic vegetables. Does the idiot eat organic vegetables?!? Hell no – he can not afford to. That stuff is expensive! Does the idiot take any vitamin supplements? Hell no, he spends all his vitamin money on beer and gas for the boat. Also, the idiot thinks that if the rabbit eats the veggies, and he eats the rabbit – it is like he is eating the veggies through a food chain middle man. So the idiot will probably get clogged arteries some day. He is really not that smart.

So Kermit – you are WRONG! It is very easy being green!

Now if you will excuse me, I have to go see the cardiologist. My left arm is tingling and there is a feeling of tightness in my chest.

And for a good laugh, check out this video someone made from another Dead Milkmen song. Click here, then click "watch this movie".

Big Lizard In My Bathtub...Can't afford to feed it anymore.

By popular demand

Due to popular demand (I call one comment "popular demand") - the story of how I got the three cats.

Gigi's story is already posted.

Sake came to me when I was at the supermarket buying beer. On the way out, there was a lady and a kid sitting behind a box. I looked into the box - and it had 6 kittens in it. I should have known better. Anyway, one of the kittens looked like a Siamese cat, which I thought would be cool to have. So I took it. When Sake was a kitten she did not have the same colors as the photo on the blog. She looked more like a Siamese. Gigi was about 1 year old at the time.

Fred came to me next. I found Fred at the same supermarket, once again while buying beer. It was raining that day, and a forlorn orange kitten was abandoned in the parking lot. He was covered in grease from using cars to hide from the rain. He let me catch him, and I saw that he had a thing around his neck that looked like a child made it. So I figured I had simply found someone's lost kitten. I went back into the store and bought some Dawn dish soap to "cut the grease" and gave Fred a bath. Then I took his picture and made a "Found Kitten" sign. I posted this sign everywhere - but nobody called. I even had the signs made in color. I must have plastered the area with a hundred signs.

Fred came into the house when Sake was about 7 months old. They are good friends now. At first Sake did not like Fred, but they soon realized they could team up to annoy Gigi.

I did get one call, about 2 weeks after I posted the signs. It was from some lady who called me to say she had found an orange kitten. I explained to her that my signs said FOUND cat, not LOST cat. Some people are not very bright.

If you are new to the blog, do not forget to read the three cat posts. Each one teaches one part of a lesson.